It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times, and now the Wooden Spooners have returned to cast their eye over the latest weekend of rugby league that was with the NRL Round 18 Results & Headlines.
Going beyond the scores, the NRL Round 18 Results & Headlines gives the extra insight in the NRL that only the Wooden Spooners can.
All reports are unconfirmed and please contact our Legal team or Buzz Rothfield aka Hans Moleman for complaints.
NRL ROUND 18 RESULTS HEADLINES
YOU KNOW WE’RE BACK IN NRL MODE WHEN THE BUNKER MAKE ANOTHER PITIFUL DECISION THAT SH-TS FANS TO TEARS
With the State of Origin boxed and buried for another year, and journalists debating the merits of Qld and NSW jerseys, it was time to get back to the NRL.
The Bunker went on to ruin other moments across the weekend, but it ensured it was back in the focus of rugby league fans with an early stuff up.
DISGRUNTLED WESTS TIGERS FAN WHO HAS ABUSED LUKE BROOKS ALL SEASON CHEEKILY ENQUIRES IF CENTRAL COAST DRIVER WHO STOPPED TO KICK THE BALL BACK IS AVAILABLE TO REPLACE LUKE BROOKS
Luke Brooks has had the second highest amount of unfair criticism this season at the Wests Tigers, behind Michael Maguire from the Fox League jerks trying to crowbar Shane Flanagan into that job. Whilst Brooks is failing to live up to the hype and pay packet, he is far from the worst NRL player of all time.
People like Mike Phillips (fake name) would disagree and have done so for the past three seasons or so. Or for a time period since a certain bus headed west.
So it was a typical NRL weekend with Phillips bagging Brooks on his Twitter account with the barely amusing handle @StripesButNoStars2005.
JOEY MANU PROMISING MID PLAY MAGIC SHOW NEXT GAME AS HE SEEKS VOLUNTEER FOR HIS NEXT TRICK
Roosters star Joey Manu had quite the game on Saturday for the Roosters against the Dragons, earning many a Supercoach point for the canny investor.
But he divided the NRL world with his feigning injury late in the game before exploding with pace and setting up yet another try.
Some say it was a brilliant piece of thinking, others that it was unsportsperson-like.
Undeterred, Manu exclusively revealed to the Wooden Spooners that he will attempt a magic trick this weekend mid sprint. There was a glimpse of a tall black hat protruding from his shorts, giving a hint of what’s to come for Round 19.
SOUTHS AND BULLDOGS ALLEGEDLY OFFERED BONUS MONEY FOR PUTTING ON 50+ POINTS AS A LEAD-IN TO THE MATTY JOHNS SHOW
Origin saw the final game of the weekend played in the premium timeslot of Sunday 6pm, and has been a regular haunt of the Bulldogs in 2022. But it’s fair to say that the 6pm Sunday games haven’t been great.
Producers of the Matty Johns Show have reportedly, according to our source, promised a $5000 Mad Monday bar tab to both sides at the Star Casino if they combined for 50 points or more, to ensure punters hung around for the later start time of the Johns-Hindmarsh-Fletcher yuk-fest.
The teams could taste those Vodka-Red Bulls in September as the total score flew past the half century.
Fans of the Matty Johns show were delighted with the usual content of in-jokes and many, many references about their own careers and the highlights/lowlights.
WE LOVE ALEX JOHNSTON
Alex Johnston grabbed yet another hat trick on Sunday night and is on his way to be the leading try scorer of all time. Who can deny he doesn’t deserve it.
Nothing cynical here, Alex Johnston is great, and may he lead PNG to World Cup glory (or semi finals).
SHANE FLANAGAN CALLS WESTS TIGERS v PENRITH PANTHERS THE WORST GAME OF THE SEASON IN A THINLY VEILED GRIPE AFTER THE WESTS TIGERS APPOINTED TIM SHEENS AND BENJI MARSHAL AS THEIR COACHING FUTURE AND ENDED A 12 MONTH CAMPAIGN OF WHITE-ANTING AND NON STOP WESTS TIGERS BASHING BY JAMES HOOPER, BUZZ ROTHFIELD AND HALF OF THE FOX LEAGUE WRITERS TO LAND THEIR MATE A GIG
Nothing more to add, refer below.
JAMES HOOPER AND FOX LEAGUE WRITERS MOVE QUICKLY TO TRASH ANOTHER TEAM – PROBABLY TO GET THEIR MATE SHANE FLANAGAN ANOTHER JOB
While the Fox League team should be respected for the speed at which they work, let’s hope the Dragon slaying isn’t as bad as the Tigers bashing.
2022 BECOMING A GOLDEN SHOWER INSTEAD OF A STORM FOR MELBOURNE
Melbourne’s loss to Canberra on Sunday was the first time in several seasons that the multiple title winners have lost three in a row.
Worse still, they lost Ryan Papenhuyzen again to injury, and probably for the rest of the season. This is in addition to a growing injury toll.
With a lot of their older players retiring to the bayside of Redcliffe next season, is their era of success coming to an end?
Local Victorian based observer Wright Stevens (fake name) stated exclusively to the Wooden Spooners “i love rugby, and if they Storms don’t make the Grand Final, I’ll be disappointed not to see my only game of the year.”
Proper Storm fans told us on the way out of AAMI Park that it’s all under control.
In possibly related news, steam was seen coming from the vicinity of the changeroom.
GREAT WEEK FOR CAMERON SMITHS
It has been a great week or so for the Cameron Smiths of this world.
Former Qld Origin great Cameron Smith helped guide Queensland to an unlikely series win as an assistant coach.
Golfer Cam Smith wins the British Open.
Local tradie Cameron Smith wins $3000 on a Poker Machine at the Kedron Wavell Services club on Wednesday night after watching the Origin game there.
SOCIALS OF THE WEEK
Our NRL Social of the Week is from a Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Pagelike it always is these days which is a must for those who love NRL, Simpsons and a laugh.
THE SHANE FLANAGAN NEW COACHING GIG-O-METER
With Shane Flanagan in the commentary box for Fox League in 2022, we can continue to expect subtle digs at teams who are struggling and that he can see a possible way in for.
So each week as part of the Wooden Spooner’s NRL Headlines, we’ll bring you the New Coaching Gig-O-Meter. This features which teams are hot for a new coach, or a team that was and is going cool.
With the above news that the Wests Tigers are going back to the future with Tim Sheens and Benji Marshall, this means the year-long campaign to shove Shane Flanagan in as the Tigers coach is over.
Flanagan is running out of clubs, but that won’t stop the Fox League machine, also as per above.
VIVEIRO, SPAIN - JULY 03: Marcus Bischoff of the German metal band Heaven Shall Burn performs in concert during Resurrection Fest on July 03, 2022 in Viveiro, Spain. (Photo by Mariano Regidor/Redferns)
A television-themed Death Metal band has become a hit on the Queensland Metal circuit.
The Brisbane-based ‘It’s Always Sunny in Killadelphia’ formed earlier this year, with songs inspired by their favourite It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia episodes.
As frontman Dale Lachlan explained to Everyday News Staff Writers, “our previous Death Metal band ‘Acid Blood’ was going nowhere, so we decided to cheer ourselves up over Christmas break by getting on the beers and marathoning It’s Always Sunny. After a few hours, we decided, ‘why not start a Sunny-themed band?”
Renaming themselves ‘It’s Always Sunny in Killadelphia’, they started with a Death Metal version of ‘The Nightman Cometh’ episode, posting the videos on their YouTube, TikTok, Instagram, and Facebook accounts.
The videos became popular among the Queensland Metal community, with IASIK playing their first live shows in February. They’ve spent the last few months playing every weekend at Metal clubs on Brisbane and the Gold Coast, mixing the ‘Nightman’ songs with original songs based on their favourite Sunny episodes.
”We were worried that the novelty would quickly wear off, but Death Metal and the narcissistic characters on the show work well together, the crowds love it, the gigs are heavy as fuck, and the new songs are coming together well!” said Dale.
IASIK have taken a small break to record their first album, ‘The Gang Goes Heavy’, which they hope to release late in 2022. While they are yet to be noticed by anyone from Sunny (despite regularly posting on social media), Dale’s hoping that changes once the first album is released.
”Our dream is to either have our music featured on the show or to appear on the show ourselves. That’d be badass!” said Dale.
Welcome back to The Gurgler’s F1 Season G-Power Rankings – our way of using various F1 based stats for 2022 to determine the most recent race and the season’s best drivers so far. Our 2022 Austrian Grand Prix Ratings is a unique collection of stats that try and find a different way to determine the best drivers.
The Power Rankings goes a little bit deeper than just points scored on the Sunday. We take on board Free Practice, Qualifying, performance in relation to team mate, fastest lap, and a few more stats that are attempting to highlight a driver outperforming the car.
A full explanation on what is included and the points awarded is below the visuals.
The 2022 Austrian Grand Prix Ratings is more than just a score for driver of the day, we have other F1 based points of interest in easy to consume visuals to tell the story of the season so far.
2022 F1 Season Power Rankings – Race 11 2022 Austrian Grand Prix Ratings
Here is the breakdown of the best and blurst driver from the most recent race at the Red Bull Ring.
2022 F1 Season Power Rankings Progress – Martini Medal Driver of the Year
Here are the current overall standings for our Driver of the Year winner – the Martini Medal. Named in honour of one of F1’s most unsung heroes – Pierluigi Martini of Minardi fame.
We have the overall scores as they stand, plus a visual which shows the flow of each driver’s position throughout the season.
2022 F1 Season Power Rankings – Other Interesting Stats
DRIVER 2022 H2H RECORD
QUALIFYING
Here our qualifying analysis covers the average grid position as well as the gap to pole.
For the gap to pole the % from pole is relative to the fastest lap in whichever qualifying session was the final one for each driver.
FIRST LAP POSITION GAINS
Here is the summary and details for first lap movement for the 2022 season so far.
Some drivers are punished for first lap shenanigans, but maybe they should behave themselves.
2022 F1 Season Power Rankings – Points Explanation
Here’s how the points work this season. Essentially the perfect race (Win from Pole, Fastest Lap, thrash team mate, best in race etc) should amount to the perfect 100 points.
FIRST LAP GAINS +0.5pts per position gained -0.5pts per position lost.
CHAMPIONSHIP POINTS – 25pts to 1pt as per World Championship – Sprint Race Points added.
BEAT TEAM MATE (RACE) – 10pts (if both finish or other driver got self inflicted DNF)
FASTEST LAP – 5pts – 1pt for top five drivers.
GRID POSITION TO RACE POSITION – formula +/- relative finish to grid
BEST OF THE REST (RACE) – 5pts to 1pt – top five non Mercedes-Red Bull drivers
QUALIFYING – 20pts to 1pt – Grid Position 1 to 20.
BEAT TEAM MATE (QUALIFYING) – 5pts
BEST OF THE REST (QUALIFYING) – 5pts to 1pt – top five non Mercedes-Red Bull drivers
GREAT/GRAPE – 5pts Great 2pts Honourable Mention -2Pts Dishonourable Mention -5Pts Grape
BEAT TEAM MATE (QUALIFYING) Time Gap – Formula for % beaten team mate by
BEAT TEAM MATE (QUALIFYING) Position – 0.5 Pts for every position team mate is beaten by. 0 points for second car.
FREE PRACTICE HERO – 10Pts to 1Pt – Average Position across all three practice sessions.
WIN FROM POLE – Bonus 5 Points
WIN FROM POLE WITH FASTEST LAP – Bonus 10 Points
SPRINT RACE – Points awarded as per F1 points from 8 to 1.
SPRINT RACE RACE GAIN – Net position from Qualifying divided by two.
Woof, how good was the third State of Origin? Better if you were a Queenslander than Andrew Johns, but what a game. Tough, fast, with loads of action – a game for the ages. No pressure then on our NRL Round 18 Tips Summary and Stats Preview.
Each week we offer up a quick preview glance for each match, a bunch of barely interesting stats, probably more than one could ever need or want.
We also offer up some alternative tips. These alternative tips are often based on a rugby league stat, and sometimes something completely absurd, and are aimed at those NRL tipsters who just can’t be bothered.
This week it’s based on the post Origin Game Three results since 2010.
So enjoy the 2022 NRL Round 18 Tips Stats Preview + Alternative Tips where there’s something for everyone. Mostly.
2022 NRL Round 18 Tips – Alternative Tips – Post State of Origin Game Three Form since 2010
Short on inspiration already? Or looking for that edge to your tipping that no one else in your competition has? Well here are the Alternative NRL Tips for this round.
Since we’re still on a high from Origin Three, let’s do each team’s winning % after Origin Three games since 2010. The higher the win % the more likely they are to win this weekend. Simples.
The full visual is in the Stats section as is plenty interesting.
ALTERNATIVE TIPS 2022 PROGRESS – 61% – 78/128
2022 NRL Round 18 Predictions – Gurgler Tips
Can we beat our own Alternative NRL tips? Usually not, so again we’ll have to keep trying.
COWBOYS to beat Sharks
EELS to beat Warriors
ROOSTERS to beat Dragons
SEA EAGLES to beat Knights
BRONCOS to beat Titans
PANTHERS to beat Tigers
STORM to beat Raiders
RABBITOHS to beat Bulldogs
OUR TIPS – 66% – 85/128
2022 NRL Round 18 Weekly H2H Stats
Looking for a cheat sheet for the weekend’s upcoming games?
Much like Noah and his ark, ours come in twos.
Here’s as much information that we could cram into one visual, or two. Click on the images for a closer look. It looks marginally more impressive closer up.
Here we take the best points of interest for each match coming up this weekend, and share them with you for no cost. Feel free to share with friends and family.
Cronulla Sharks have won seven in a row v North Queensland.
Roosters have won their last three at Central Coast Stadium on a Saturday.
St George Illawarra have won just four of their last 21 away games v Sydney clubs going back to 2019.
Newcastle Knights have won two of the last three games at Brookvale v Manly.
Newcastle are L9 W1 v top eight sides though.
Brisbane Broncos are unbeaten in eight games v bottom eight sides (based on opponent ladder position at time of match) and the Gold Coast haven’t beaten a top eight side this season either in 12 attempts.
Penrith Panthers are the only team with a 100% winning record away from home this season.
Melbourne Storm have won 11 games in a row at home on a Sunday v all opposition. The last loss was in August 2018.
Canberra Raiders have never beaten the Storm in an away game on a Sunday in four attempts.
Canberra have the best post Origin Three winning % and they had the worst winning % after the second State of Origin games since 2010.
2022 NRL Round 18 Barely Interesting Stats Extra
POST STATE OF ORIGIN THREE GAME WINNING % SINCE 2010
CENTRAL COAST STADIUM WINNING % SINCE 1998
Since the Roosters are hitting the Central Coast to play this weekend, what better time to unveil each team’s winning %.
2022 NRL Round 18 NRL 2022 Season – Team Stats
We have taken the best of the NRL data and turned them into visuals you can use to enjoy your rugby league this weekend.
There’s run metres, kicking stats, errors, tackled and lack of tackles.
Plus we also have each team’s record against the top and bottom teams and home v away.
There’s so much you’ll need to stop halfway to catch your breath.
TEAM RECORD V TOP & BOTTOM EIGHT SIDES
Note – top / bottom eight is decided at time of match not current ladder.
TEAM RECORD – HOME & AWAY
Note – not the awful soap on Channel 7
KICKING STATS
Note: last graph is a 100% breakdown of kick types.
RUNNING STATS
TACKLES
BAD BOYS
2022 NRL Season Prediction Results
Our tips jumped ahead of the alternative tips last week, so now onto bigger and better things.
ALTERNATIVE TIPS 6/8 First Round Form 4/8 More Dangerous Mascot 3/8 Best H2H 6/8 April Fools 7/8 Bad Boy Points (Penalties/Sin Bins etc) 5/8 Greens Votes 6/8 Marginal Seats 5/8 Covid Cases 6/8 May Record 3/8 Suncorp Stadium Record 4/8 ALP Voting 2/8 Green / Teal Colour Wheel 1/4 June Form since 1998 6/8 Post Origin I Form 5/8 Winter Form 5/8 Post Origin II Form 4/4 Kicking Kings
Queensland have overcome the odds to win the third State of Origin clash and with it the 2022 Series. As ever there was plenty happening so the Wooden Spooners have a special edition of their usual weekend highlights with the State Of Origin Game 3 Headlines.
Going beyond the scores, the State Of Origin Game 3 Headlines gives the extra insight in the big games that only the Wooden Spooners can.
All reports are unconfirmed and please contact our Legal team or Buzz Rothfield aka Hans Moleman for complaints.
JUST ONE TO GO….
Fox League/Kayo regulars are counting down the only remaining rugby league game they have to suffer on Channel Nein this year. – the Grand Final. And thank god.
It’s not that the coverage was worse than usual, it was just the same.
Ads, cross promote, late kick off time because of so much pre-game hype, and Andrew Johns’ petulant, spoiled brat performance at the end sums up the professionalism.
And because of Channel Nein and the NRL with State of Origin, it looks as if there won’t be any International tests next year, they can get stuffed again.
So just the Grand Final left to endure then.
FIRST TIME ORIGIN VIEWER STRANGELY GETS HANKERING TO PLACE MANY SAME GAME MULTIS BEFORE KICK OFF
Our Melbourne Wooden Spooners correspondent reports of a fellow work mate who decided to tune into the big “origin rugby” clash on Wednesday for the first time.
Sam Samuelson (fake name) had previously only tuned into the “rugby” to watch the Grand Finals that the “Melbourne Lightning” had made, so Wednesday was the first taste of interstate footy of any form since AFL can’t be bothered.
But not being a seasoned Origin viewer he foolishly tuned in from the beginning of the coverage, unless others who find the Sportsbet kick off time and tune in 60 seconds after that time.
With the barrage of odds and ads for betting, the Victorian “rugby” convert had opened a Sportsbet account and laid on five same game multis before kick off. Well, obviously before kick off as he wouldn’t be able to bet after the game had started.
The point being, man gets into betting after loads of coverage.
“DOESN’T THE BLOCK LOOK GOOD THIS YEAR” SAYS MAN WHO PRE-LOADED TOO MANY DRINKS BEFORE THE GAME
Dave-o, as he is affectionately knows as by his others mates whose names end in O or eeeeee, wanted to get pumped for the big decider so he decided to go pretty hard on the drink before the game. And to ensure the prolonged pre game hype was sped up.
Mission accomplished as he smashed down eight Great Northerns (which he was calling Greg Normans by night’s end) six OP Rum & Cola cans, with an occasional swig of Stone’s Ginger Wine as a body shaking chaser.
This led to Dave-o being pretty well smashed by kick off, the exciting and fierce opening to the game made him pretty tough work to be around until the brain had reached alcohol saturation point and he dozed off, and missed most of the game.
His friends knew he was in trouble when he remarked at a pre match promo “Geez, Doesn’t The Block Look Good and Different This Year”. The comment was completely out of character as Dave-o had previously stated sober that MAFS is the lowest common denominator of human life, marginally behind Big Brother. And that all reality TV can kiss his arse.
BILLY MOORE CELEBRATES 1000 “QUEENSLANDERS” ON WEDNESDAY
Unofficial Queensland chief of motivation Billy Moore was out and about in Brisbane on Wednesday, much to the joy of his fellow Queenslanders.
Most of whom yelled Queenslander at him and expected a reply, which he gave on just about every occasion.
Moore’s throat was sore by the end of the night, a combination of “Queenslanders” and screaming at Queensland’s on field win.
Unlike other artists who always seem intent on “playing one from the new album”, Moore seems happy enough to say Queenslander for the rest of his life.
He was presented with a post game steak with 10 candles in it at an exclusive get together at the Caxton for Fox League staff. Reports that Moore ate the candles along with the steak are unconfirmed. As is the reports the side garnish was not appreciated.
TINO FA’ASUAMALEAUI AND JAROME LUAI JOINT WINNERS OF STATE OF ORIGIN THREE JERK OF THE MATCH
Jarome Luai was nominated for Jerk of the Match for standing over a clearly concussed Selwyn Cobbo in the first brutal minutes of the Origin. Doing no favours to those who try and defend Penrith from people who say they way too arrogant. Luai went on to have an ordinary second half and miss out on back to back Origin series as his reward.
Tino Fa’asuamaleaui gets his nomination for holding onto Matt Burton in his battle with Dane Gagai and turning him into a human punching bag. Not that we are condoning punches being thrown on field, but if they do there should be no king hits running in from the side or holding players arms so they can’t fight back. Tino was rewarded with going on report for a high shot on Matt Burton, with the silver lining meaning he may miss games for the Titans.
For the record Buzz Rothfield had plenty to say about the biffo. For the record, Buzz sucks for every possible reason.
In our Origin Game Three Preview which very few people read, we supplied a bunch of stats which showed Queensland’s great record for game three and deciders, et al. Who’s Al? And why can you call me Betty for that matter.
We supplied them in hope that the record would be better than the actual team which on paper as ever was not as good as NSW.
But here’s a choice selection of the now updated stats.
QLD have now won the series 7/8 when winning the first game in Sydney
Qld never been beaten at Lang Pk in a decider when winning the first game in Sydney. (3/3)
12 third game deciders at Lang Park – QLD 9 NSW 2 Draw 1– QLD have won the last six.
– NSW last series decider win @ Lang Pk was 2005
IN OTHER STATE OF ORIGIN GAME 3 HEADLINES
Annastacia Palaszczuk appears less concerned about a football game going on with thousands of daily Covid cases and double figure death count than an All-Sydney Grand Final with a handful of cases
Matt Burton being lined up for a 1992 Barcelona Olympics style lighting the flame trick for the 2032 Brisbane Olympics.
Telstra Tracker can track NRL players running around a field but not how long it takes to get a call answered by their call centre.
Andrew Johns given post game lollypop after On-Air sook spoiling his work as the best commentator on Channel Nein by some distance.
Katy Perry’s Menulog Ad still sucks. Where’s Dell?
It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times, and now the Wooden Spooners have returned to cast their eye over the latest weekend of rugby league that was with the NRL Round 17 Results & Headlines.
Going beyond the scores, the NRL Round 17 Results & Headlines gives the extra insight in the NRL that only the Wooden Spooners can.
All reports are unconfirmed and please contact our Legal team or Buzz Rothfield aka Hans Moleman for complaints.
NRL ROUND 17 HEADLINES
AAMI PARK STAFF LOOKING TO REINFORCE COACHES BOX WINDOW BEFORE ROUND 18 CLASH
After two losses in a row, and two poor performances too, you can feel the anger building towards his side. Much like a Purple Incredible Hulk.
So being the canny operators they are, the AAMI Park management have reportedly triple glazed the window in the Bellamy coaches box for this weekend’s clash with the Raiders.
It could be a big day for referee sprays with another angry man Ricky Stuart bringing his team to Melbourne on Sunfay afteroon.
FANS OF HARRAGON-CARROLL CLASH FROM 90’s DISAPPOINTED WHEN KOLOAMATANGI DOESN’T TAKE THAT FIRST HIT UP AFTER FACE OFF WITH DAVID KLEMMER
Artists Impression
The most interesting part of the Newcastle-South Sydney game for neutrals was the big face off between David Klemmer and Keaon Koloamatangi late in the game. For almost a minute the two big forwards faced off with various challenges outside the ground looking like they were being offered.
So what a shame when the Rabbitohs won the penalty from the event that the South Sydney forward didn’t take the first hit ups from the tap restart.
A 90’s NRL fan remarked to the Wooden Spooners reproted at the ground in the line up for a post game leak that the “Harragon-Carroll smash-up back in the day was the best thing ever”, and he “still remembers it like it was yesterday.”
It was a bit of a shame. Our artist’s impression is above.
JAMES HOOPER CELEBRATES HIS 100TH WESTS TIGERS BASHING ARTICLE FOR 2022
The Wests Tigers put up a decent fight against Parramatta, but despite the loss there was yet another couple of articles on the Fox League website bashing most aspects of the Wests Tigers.
While Hooper is not wrong about how hopeless the Tigers management team are, the constant bashing got boring months ago. You would have thought sacking Maguire might have slowed them down a bit.
Whether there is a hidden agenda for a mate in the commentary box, or there’s some kind of deep seated hatred for no good reason, or just an interesting story. All we know we hope they find another club to smash next year. Or even for the rest of this season.
SOCIALS OF THE WEEK
Our NRL Social of the Week is from a Simpsons Related NRL Memes Facebook Pagelike it always is these days which is a must for those who love NRL, Simpsons and a laugh.
THE SHANE FLANAGAN NEW COACHING GIG-O-METER
With Shane Flanagan in the commentary box for Fox League in 2022, we can continue to expect subtle digs at teams who are struggling and that he can see a possible way in for.
So each week as part of the Wooden Spooner’s NRL Headlines, we’ll bring you the New Coaching Gig-O-Meter. This features which teams are hot for a new coach, or a team that was and is going cool.
With so many coaches gone or teams in poor form, the Coaching Gig-O-Meter is going off the charts.
Gold Coast Titans look the most likely to have a vacancy, but the Tigers still don’t have a coach for next season. Until they do, Flanagan and Fox League will be on the sniff.
So it’s all come down to this, a State of Origin series decider at Lang Park aka Suncorp Stadium, the home of the first Origin game. So there’s as much pressure on our Barely Interesting 2022 State of Origin Game 3 Preview as the players. Well, almost.
Our Barely Interesting 2022 State of Origin Game 3 Preview is much like our weekly NRL previews – lots of barely interesting facts, some colourful visuals, and took a long time to do and likely very few readers.
Some of the stats might get you maroon/blue blood flowing, or change your bet for the big game, or settle an argument or two. Or feature in urinal chats at the Caxton.
Either way the Barely Interesting 2022 State of Origin Game 3 Preview is ready for those who love their stats.
STATE OF ORIGIN 3 PREVIEW – GAME STATS
DECIDERS @ LANG PARK
11 third game deciders at Lang Park – QLD 8 NSW 2 Draw 1
– QLD have won the last five.
– NSW last series decider win @ Lang Pk was 2005
– NSW’s two series wins @ Lang Pk have come when Qld win the first game.
DECIDERS
21 Times third game is a decider at all grounds – QLD 14 NSW 5 Draw 2
12 Times Game Three is a series decider after Qld winning the first game – Record is QLD 8 NSW 3 Draw 1
Nine of those games @ Lang Pk – Record QLD 6 NSW 2 Draw 1 – Qld won last four.
Five times NSW have won the second game at a neutral venue – NSW won the series four times.
GAME THREE STATS
All Game three – 40 Matches – QLD 26 NSW 12 Draw 2
Of the 40 games – Game One Winner has won Game Three 17 times – and lost 21 times with two draws.
24 Times Game Three at Lang Park – QLD 16 NSW 7 Draw 1
GAME ONE STATS INTO SERIES WINNER
30 Times the Game One Winner has won the series. 16 QLD 8 NSW
17 Times the Game One Winner has conceded 10 or less points in Game One out of 21 occurrences.
20 Times the Game One margin is six points or less – 6 have failed to win the series and 14 have won.
QLD have won the series 6/7 when winning the first game in Sydney
Qld never been beaten at Lang Pk in a decider when winning the first game in Sydney. (2/2)
VERDICT – There’s a lot of Game Three and Decider H2H Stats that favour Queensland. Especially at Suncorp Stadium and after winning the first game in Sydney. But stats are stats
MORE GAME THREE STATS
TOTAL POINTS BY DAY FOR GAME THREE BY VENUE
Ground
Decider
Dead Rubber
Overall
Docklands
30.0
30.0
Gold Coast
38.0
38.0
Lang Park
39.0
34.8
36.8
QE II
54.0
54.0
S.C.G.
15.0
15.0
S.F.S.
21.5
45.0
33.3
Stadium Australia
36.0
48.3
40.6
Overall
35.8
38.2
36.9
TOTAL POINTS / AVERAGE MARGIN FOR GAME THREE
Total Points
Decider
35.8
Dead Rubber
38.2
Average Margin
Decider
11.3
Dead Rubber
12.1
STATE OF ORIGIN GAME 3 PREVIEW – PLAYER STATS
Was RCG dudded by not getting called up? Is Josh Papali’i deserving of another chance? What has Tom Gilbert done? Ben Hunt v Tom Dearden?
Answers to those and many other things are available in our next section, where we compile various 2022 player stats and show them side by side by position.
These are all NRL competition stats not State of Origin.
HALVES
VERDICT – Stats point to starting with Ben Hunt not Tom Dearden.
FULLBACKS
VERDICT – James Tedesco looks a lot better on paper in 2022 than Ponga.
CENTRES / WINGERS
VERDICT – Possibly the most even battle of the position H2H, although Matt Burton proved the difference in Game Two and he’s not usually a centre. For no good reason we say that Dane Gagai will have a blinder, so stuff the stats.
HOOKER
VERDICT – Harry Grant is one hell of a hooker but NSW win this H2H with two quality hookers playing in their regular position. You think Ben Hunt may be forced to help out elsewhere.
STARTING FORWARDS
VERDICT – Tino may enjoy playing with a better side, and he tops a lot of the stats here. But Queensland’s starting forwards in comparison to NSW look a little shy of the Blues’ best.
BENCH FORWARDS
VERDICT – If Patrick Carrigan can get going like he did in Game One then Queensland could have their nose in front here. Jai Arrow has been no slouch too. If you’re looking for Talakai, he is in the Centres-Wingers section.
SPIELBERG, AUSTRIA - JULY 10: Race winner Charles Leclerc of Monaco and Ferrari and Second placed Max Verstappen of the Netherlands and Oracle Red Bull Racing celebrate on the podium during the F1 Grand Prix of Austria at Red Bull Ring on July 10, 2022 in Spielberg, Austria. (Photo by Clive Rose/Getty Images)
The hills are alive to the sound of roaring F1 engines. And eventually the sound of the Monaco national anthem as Charles Leclerc defied Max Verstappen and the trend of his season recently to win. Our 2022 Austrian Grand Prix Results, Lap by Lap, Review & Summary will try and do the race justice.
Our review covers what happened in the race so you don’t have to in the laps that matter. Plus we throw in our Race Ratings, the Best (Great) and Worst (Grape) drivers of the race weekend.
The 2022 Austrian Grand Prix Results, Lap by Lap, Review & Summary gives you just enough to catch up with. With just a small serving of cynicism. The perfect bite sized review for those who couldn’t be bothered, or don’t have enough time.
2022 Austrian Grand Prix Results
THE LAPS THAT MATTERED
Didn’t see the race live? Don’t have time to watch the whole race? Well here are the top laps where stuff happened. We write these live as we go, sort of like a minute by minute for the football, but marginally more interesting.
Setting the Scene – Well there was sprint race won by Max Verstappen on the Saturday from the pole position he won on Friday, behind that there were a few Ferrari battling for next best which eventually fell to Charles Leclerc. Sergio Perez was the eye catcher moving from 13th in qualifying to 5th by the end of the sprint race. Normally we’d provide a lap by lap of the sprint race, but they are becoming a waste of time and effort.
A bit of a mix up of the bottom half of the top ten which sets the grid for the race. Fernando Alonso the big loser retiring on the first lap and will start from the back row of the grid with Valtteri Bottas who took penalties for new parts.
The parade lap featured more orange smoke than Pauline Hanson being unable to answer a difficult question but gotta love the Dutch F1 fans enthusiasm.
TOP 10 GRID – VER LEC SAI RUS PER OCO MAG HAM MSC NOR
Lap 1 – Max Verstappen gets away well and leads Leclerc into the first major corners. George Russell overtakes Carlos Sainz briefly into turn one but by turn three is behind. Which leaves him battling with Sergio Perez and they collide at the fourth corner. Perez tries to go around the outside which is never going to work and ends up in the gravel, move was never on and is punished accordingly. In good news for Australian F1 fans Daniel Ricciardo makes a good start and is 9th and ahead of his team mate. Probably won’t last, but we’ll take it given the 2022 season of misery. Back of the grid fast cars Bottas, Vettel and Alonso yet to pass Latifi, which is an indication of a lack of progress. By lap seven Alonso and friends are stil lnot ahead.
ORDER – VER LEC SAI RUS OCO MAG HAM MSC RIC NOR
Lap 5 – Five laps in and not a great deal of action, aside from Mick Schumacher getting past Lewis Hamilton who had a bit of a moment coming out of a corner. Further ahead Max Verstappen is just six tenths ahead of Charles Leclerc who holds fastest lap for now. There could be a race in this after all. For context Sainz is already two second behind Leclerc with Russell six second behind Sainz.
Lap 8-9 – Charles Leclerc is having a genuine sniff at the rear end of Max Verstappen. Of course these are F1 drivers we are talking about and not dogs, but that’s how close the two are heading into turn three. One wonders if Max will cock his leg at Leclerc at some stage.
Lap 10 – Wow! Leclerc almost sneaks up the inside of turn three but somehow Verstappen stays ahead on the outside. Learning nothing from Sergio Perez, Leclerc tries aroudn the outside of the next major braking point and loses time. Not much, but enough to stuff him for the next lap overtaking.
George Russell gets a five second penalty for the turn one clash. Bit harsh considering Perez shouldn’t have bothered. But consistent with previous season’s incidents. Russell takes his penalty and a fresh set of tyres, a new front wing and a change of strategy.
Lap 12 – Charles Leclerc overtakes Max Verstappen for the lead!!! Leclerc seems to take Verstappen by surprise into turn five (or four not sure) and dives down the inside. Verstappen, who seems to be showing Leclerc respect leaves room. Interesting that Leclerc and Verstappen, and everyone else other than Lewis Hamilton and Verstappen can race without clashing this year. Max Verstappen pits a lap later and drops to 8th. It’s a mixed up order now on lap 14.
ORDER – LEC SAI OCO MAG MSC HAM NOR VER STR TSU
Lap 15 – Magic overtake on Mick Schumacher by Lewis Hamilton on a corner which sees minimal overtaking. A podium is available here if he can jump the previous lesser cars. A lap later he also gets past Magnussen for 4th. Good race brewing for Sir Lewis. Pity he is 20 seconds behind Leclerc already with Max right on his tail. Do we have to refer to a earlier entry soon. We’ll see.
Lap 19 – Max flies past Lewis Hamilton due to the fact he has fresher tyres and a better car.
Lap 20 – After being distracted by the Wimbledon final of Jerk v Jerkovic we realised that we’ve missed a few pitstops. Not the Ferraris though who are 1-2 or Lewis Hamilton. Maybe the Ferraris are doing something special with their strategy. Based on previous races where they have screwed Leclerc royally we find that hard to believe.
Lap 22 – Some fun racing in the midfield between a bunch of cars. You can usually rely on cars 7th to 12th to provide some entertainment. Time for a quick order check, although it is probably a waste of time due to pits stops or not.
ORDER LEC SAI VER HAM STR OCO TSU ZHO ALO MAG
Lap 25 – Wow again. You should probably see the above bunch of five midfield cars going two and three wide and deep into all the corners of lap 25. Norris starts the lap 11th and halfway around is 8th then 9th. Hard to keep up. God bless the midfield. For the record Daniel Ricciardo is just about to join the battle too.
Lap 26 – A Red Bull and a Ferrari pit. Leclerc for tyres and Perez to retire. Leclerc gets out in front of Lewis Hamilton (4th) and obviously Perez just gets out of his car. In less exciting news Sainz pits the next lap, but he doesn’t get out in front of Lewis Hamilton. The race is here for the taking for Leclerc. Unless his team have a bad track record in 2022 for unreliability and bad strategy. Hmmmm, that don’t sound good does it.
Lap 29 – Lewis Hamilton pits. It was a slow one for this day and age – four seconds. Comes out behind Ocon as punishment. For the record Nick Kyrgios won the first set of the Wimbledon final.
Lap 32 – Charles Leclerc catching up with Max Verstappen in front. The Ferrari driver setting a fresh fastest lap for a decent marker. Interesting with the difference in strategy how this will play out.
Lap 33 – Charles Leclerc eases past Max Verstappen for first in the most casual pass for first in recent years. Verstappen looks to be having tyres troubles or settling for second. Something you can afford with a sprint race win in your pocket and a handy Championship lead. Everyone has pitted so time for an order update.
ORDER – LEC VER SAI HAM OCO MSC MAG NOR RUS RIC
Lap 35 – Lando Norris gets a five second penalty for track limits a lap after Pierre Gasly gets one. The field is now on notice with penalties handed out to drivers with more regularity than a first day of school parking blitz. Zhou gets one a lap later.
Lap 37 – Max Verstappen pits for new tyres. Now this is interesting. Do Ferrari stop for new tyres eventually or do they hang on with older (and slower) rubber. We’ll have to keep an eye on the gap between Leclerc and Verstappen and see if it is within a pitstop (18-20 seconds). Obviously Max drops behind Carlos Sainz.
Lap 38 – For those who have advised us we are too hard on Latifi, he is dead last 24 seconds behind second last and over 30 seconds behind his team mate. Sure we are simply hoping he gets the arse for Australian Oscar Piastri, but surely no one will really mind.
Lap 40 – Sebastian Vettel, who we forgot was in this race, spins. Replays shows a clash with Pierre Gasly who looks plenty to blame. For the record Vettel still resumes ahead of Latifi. But that’s enough bashing of him for now. What’s happening further ahead.
Lap 42 – Well thanks for asking. Is George Russell pitting from 9th high enough? Not really, as he only joins 14th. What about Lando Norris getting past Kevin Magnussen for 7th? Still not good enough? Well Max Verstappen is within 17 seconds of Leclerc which will begin to make Ferrari start second guessing their strategy. That’s not a good thing.
ORDER – LEC SAI VER HAM OCO MSC NOR RIC ALO STR (Magnussen pits as we were typing)
Lap 43 – Lewis Hamilton gets a five second penalty too. It’s getting a little Oprah Winfrey here. E.g. “You Get One, You Get One, etc”. Lame joke we know, but you think of something better at After Midnight. The time, not the JJ Cale song or movie.
Lap 45 – George Russell overtakes two cars in one lap. Decent effort, one was on Lance Stroll. Who loses out to Mick Schumacher a few corners later. Maybe he can ask his dad to buy the places back. In fairness, Stroll passes Mick Schumacher back on a good move half a lap later. A lap after that Stroll loses out to both Haas drivers in the first few corners.
Lap 49 – Interesting, Esteban Ocon in sixth unlaps himself on leader Charles Leclerc. Realising that staying out will completely f–k their race, Ferrari pit Leclerc. Of course the Ferrari driver will fall behind Verstappen, but it’s only three or so seconds and his tyres are 13 laps newer. Sainz gets some fresh rubber a lap later.
Lap 52 – Finding his race as pointless as we do, Nicholas Latifi retires.
Lap 53 – Charles Leclerc and Max Verstappen battle for the lead, swapping positions for a few corners from turn three. Leclerc takes the lead and he should win this easily. Apologies in advance for Leclerc for the potential kiss of death. We like Leclerc.
Lap 57 – Did we mention Ferrari reliability earlier? Well, Carlos Sainz retires with a busted engine just as he approaches Max Verstappen for second. In sort of funny scenes the car catches on fire, and understandably Carlos Sainz jumps out, but then the car starts rolling back down the steep hill. This sets off a Virtual Safety Car, and both Leclerc and Verstappen pit. So Ferrari are learning then. Pity about Sainz who looks rather sad at his DNF. Fair enough too. Daniel Ricciardo on for point in 10th, so happy days.
ORDER – LEC VER HAM OCO RUSS MSC MAG NOR ALO RIC
Lap 60 – The Virtual Safety Car “leaves the track” and the race resumes.
Lap 61 – Leclerc radios his team to say his throttle is “feeling funny”. Given Sainz’s recent retirement, you can smell the upcoming disappointment.
Lap 62 – George Russell passes Esteban Ocon for fourth. That’ll probably work for both of them. Norris gets past Magnussen for 7th. Further ahead Mick Schumacher doing a good job in 6th.
Lap 64 – Leclerc is still worried about his throttle, and Max Verstappen is catching and setting a fastest lap. Just seven laps to go and this will be tense for Ferrari. Max Verstappen edging closer and closer by a tenth here and there. Gap is down to 3.1 seconds by lap 67. Losing a tenth of a second per sector.
Decent battle for 10th between Bottas and Albon.
Lap 68 – Leclerc’s lead is down to 2.7 seconds. Verstappen could be within a second (and DRS) by the last lap. How exciting.
Lap 70 – Lead stretches out to 3.0 seconds with a lap to go. With the lap shorter than a trip to the local shops he should be OK now.
Last Lap – Charles Leclerc holds on to win the 2022 Austrian Grand Prix, and who could begrudge him the win after some bad luck in 2022. But Max Verstappen does get rather close by the end of the lap. Good day for Mercedes with a 3-4 finishing position, albeit with Hamilton 40 seconds behind the top two. Good points for Alpine, Haas and McLaren in no particular order. The Dutch fans let off their orange flares regardless of a lack of wins. Either a devil-may-care attitude or respect for Leclerc.
FINAL ORDER – LEC VER HAM RUS OCO MSC NOR MAG RIC ALO
2022 Austrian Grand Prix Results
RACE RATING
Was it a good race, loads of action, tense, or just a big, fat, snooze-fest.
We rate the big race itself so we know which races to go back and watch in the off season or one to simply remember the winner for the post season quiz nights.
SEASON IMPORTANCE – 8 / 10
Good result for the Championship with Leclerc not only ahead of Verstappen for this race, but they had the genuine speed, if not the ultimate reliability.
ON TRACK ACTION – 9 / 10
Passes for the lead. loads of midfield battles including a five car royal rumble at one stage. Austria usually provides entertainment being an oversized go kart track, and it delivered as ever.
ENDING 7 / 10
A late Virtual Safety Car gave the top two fresh tyres and chance for an exciting finish. Tense times for Leclerc as he worried about a car issue for the last eight laps or so, and rightly worried after his team mate’s car burst into flames not much earlier.
OVERALL RATING 24 / 30
Another good race at the Red Bull Ring, no wonder they had two races here during Covid. And who doesn’t love the Italian National Anthem.
2022 SEASON RATINGS SO FAR
Want to know what we thought of previous races? Or which ones to to back and watch?
2022 Austrian Grand Prix Results
GREAT & GRAPE OF THE RACE
Here we go through the field and highlight the very best (Great) of the race, and the plodders, the over-ambitious, the out of luck, and simply hopeless (Grape).
These points get added to our Driver of the Season scores. Five points for a great nomination, and -5 for the worst or grapest driver in the pack. Then it is +2 /-2 for honourable or dishonourable mentions.
It used to be called the good, bad and ugly, but everyone is using that now. And who doesn’t like grapes.
THE GREAT-EST – CHARLES LECLERC
Get his first win in 2022 since Australia, which is so long ago we can’t remember how many races ago it was. For once the car held together and he wasn’t stuffed by his team on strategy. Solid stuff and good for the Championship.
HONOURABLE MENTIONS
LEWIS HAMILTON – Another podium, so good enough end result. His Mercedes is quite a bit behind the top two though.
ESTEBAN OCON – Solid fifth placing, and he drove an obscure race which is a good sign he had a good day out.
MICK SCHUMACHER – Followed up points in the last raced with more here, and he looked quite competent racing against more established drivers and World Champions no less.
MCLARENS – Given how bad it looked at times over the weekend, double points will be welcomed. Norris looked as fast as ever around the Austrian track.
THE GRAPE-EST – CARLOS SAINZ
Lost a probably second place with an engine failure followed by a fire. Was second best to Leclerc most of the weekend.
DIS-HONOURABLE MENTIONS
SERGIO PEREZ – Not a wise move around the outside of George Russell at turn four. You have to be really good or lucky to make that stick early in a race and the Mexican was neither.
SEBASTIAN VETTEL – Not a great weekend all round and whatever he was trying to earn back was wasted by being turfed off the track by Pierre Gasly.
NICHOLAS LATIFI – Surely it’s time to give anyone else a go.
2022 F1 Season Power Rankings
Stay tuned for our Power Rankings from the race soon as it is currently being calculated.
The Canberra Raiders have avoided one of the more embarrassing defeats of 2022, squeezing past the Bye in Golden Point at Bruce Stadium.
The Raiders looked set for a huge win against their invisible rivals, with Jordan Rapana scoring two tries down the Bye’s right edge in the first 10 minutes. Though Jamal Fogarty’s two missed sideline conversions meant Canberra only led 8-0.
A brilliant chip-and-chase try to Xavier Savage, and Fogarty’s successful conversion, gave Canberra a 14-0 half-time lead. Still, long-suffering Raiders fans feared it wasn’t enough.
But there was a twist in the game, as the Raiders players – terrified of another second-half fade-out – barricaded themselves in their dressing room, with the Bye awarded 14 penalty points to send the game to Golden Point.
Not wanting to blow the guaranteed two competition points, the Raiders came out for the GP period, with Fogarty quickly icing the game with a field goal on the first set.
Ricky Stuart was happy with the win, but said his boys would need to actually turn up for the full 80 against Melbourne to keep their slim finals hopes alive.
June 30 has passed so it is the right time for a EOFY stocktake of the world’s biggest jerks, and to balance the books the Jerk of the Month June 2022 Nominations are ready for reconciliation.
Of course it is early July and we’re a bit late, but things at EOFY take time.
June 2022 isn’t any different to a lot of other months, there’s the usual array of awful people or people being awful. Some are new, some are old favourites. All are or have been jerks recently.
Determining the month’s biggest jerk is ultimately up to you, the reader of this website. So read the form guide, and vote now. Feel free to vote early and vote often. For as many of the candidates whose cut of jib you dislike.
The Jerk of the Month June 2022 “winner” awaits your vote below.
#VoteEarlyVoteOften
VOTE NOW – Jerk of the Month June 2022
There’s only one way to determine the biggest jerk this month – your vote.
Vote for one, vote for two, feel free to vote for as many of these jerks as you like or all of them. They’ve asked for it.
FORM GUIDE – Jerk of the Month June 2022 Nominations
NICK KYRGIOS
Nick Kyrgios has had a vintage Wimbledon tournament, and we write this before the outcome of his big game on Wednesday, giving his fans and the public everything he has to offer.
Spitting towards a spectator caught the eye of officials, same with his dress code, press conferences, on court antics, and more. Although John McEnroe having a go at him in commentary is the most pot-kettle in the history of pots and kettle.
We for one hope he wins it all. It would be great for so many reasons – an Aussie winning Wimbledon, a definitive up yours to Bernard Tomic after their recent Social Media spat, and the fallout from the world’s media if he wins.
But he certainly deserves a nomination for Jerk of the Month.
He’s doubled down insisting he’s done nothing wrong, just like any good Jerk of the Month nomination would do.
A first JOM-NOM for Piquet, but he would have likely had a lot more if this website was older.
RALPH BABET
Haven’t heard of Ralph Babet? We don’t blame you, who would usually know who the last elected senator in Victoria is.
The difference with Ralph Babet is that he was a United Australia Party candidate, and a rare successful one. Well, the only one. Now that’s the biggest waste of $100M since Clive Palmer wasted aroudn the same amount at the last election.
So why is this Victorian senator-elect nominated for jerk of the month? Surely a UAP senator is as worthy as any party in a democratic country.
For his continued exercise into Ukraine, that allegedly has a line of people waiting to knock him off. Much like the scene in Flying High/Airplane of the line of people looking to slap the freaked out woman on the plane.
Already a multiple winner in 2022, he’s looking for a rare win.
NRL
A few weekends ago rugby league celebrated one of it’s best weekends. A range of Junior, Women’s and Men’s State of Origin games, plus a full book of Pacific Tests including PNG’s win over Fiji were played and enjoyed by all.
So the NRL in their wisdom say that’s not going to happen next year, and all three State of Origin games are going to be on a Wednesday. Which sucks just by itself.
But why on earth would the rugby bosses want less Pacific nations rugby league than more? Because they are jerks and they suck.
COVID
Still causing misery and interruption to lives around the world.
US SUPREME COURT
For making the USA a more divided place than ever.
