The votes have been counted, and the people have decided that David Warner and Donald Trump Jerk of the Year 2018 joint winners.
2018 really has been the Year of the Jerk, and the two winners beat a very large field of monthly winners and other assorted jerks.
Sadly the Jerk of the Year always attracts twice the amounts of candidates and votes every month, and the annual choice was no different. It really is a Year of the Jerk.
DONALD TRUMP JERK OF THE YEAR 2018
Donald Trump Jerk of the Year for 2018 is hardly a surprise, given his daily offerings from the USA, and continual spiral downwards towards 2020. From forgetting the name of a town he was visiting which had been decimated by fire, to shutting down the US, all the firings, and the constant lying, there is no doubt that Donald Trump Jerk of the Year in 2018 is a title that suits more than POTUS.
DAVID WARNER ALSO JERK OF THE YEAR 2018
Those outside of the cricket playing nations may be surprised as the other half of the duo that won 2018 Jerk of the Year. But trust us, David Warner thoroughly earned his Jerk of the Year win.
Those in the cricket playing nations that care about the sport will know David Warner has had a big year. On and off the cricket field.
From all reports he was the instigator of the sandpaper ball tampering scandal, confirming his early jerk-work by making a junior player do it. Then came the stage-managed press conference with all the trimmings. Finally the walk off for being sledged in his comeback through club cricket showed that hypocrisy and jerk certainly can go hand in hand.
Perhaps 2019 will be a better year for him, and hopefully that includes zero cricket for Australia. Help himself to all the overseas T20 he can eat.
“BEST” OF THE REST
Politics in Australia, Channel Nein, and NRL all feature in the also-rans, although some of them ran the winners very close.
Two of the conspirators of the Turnbull downfall who couldn’t count – Peter Dutton and Tony Abbott – came third and fifth. Dutton makin a last ditch attempt with his little tantrum about Malcolm Turnbull in the last few days. Both he and Abbott look likely to be doing something else after the next election. If we’re lucky.
NRL and Channel Nein soak up the rest of the top half results, with Gus Gould annoying our readers as ever, the NRL itself for a hopeless 2018 of administrating, and serial jerk Karl Stefanovic in the running.
With Karl getting the Today show boot, all we can hope for is a divorce between Channel Nein and the NRL to mke the world a better place.
Two reality shows make up the next best, with “Social experiment” featuring some of the worst people on earth finishing just in front of the cooking-crying tele-drama that is MKR.
Others were all worthy monthly winners, but ultimately were nowhere near as bad as David Warner and Donald Trump Jerk of the Year 2018 Joint Winners.
So much Premier League Football, and there’s even more to come, as well as our Premier League Predictions Week 21 for the last time this calendar year.
Every week we offer up our Premier League predictions, along with a mini preview of each match, with a few best bets in an alternative Premier League preview.
We also put our tips up against a competitor, usually not human though, and based on some football stat or general life. This week our tipping opponent is based on each team’s regional drinking stats in honour of New Year’s Eve.
It’s a lot like the BBC’s Lawros tips, but better. Arguably.
Premier League Predictions Week 21 – Gurgler v New Years Eve Drinking
TIPS BACKGROUND: Since these Premier League statistics will follow one of the biggest drinking days of the year, we will use UK drinking figures to determine some tips.
We found some stats on drinking in the UK by area, so we have turned them into tips in the following way….
Whichever region of the UK drinks more between the two sides, that side’s fans could be more hungover than the other sets of fans, so they would be quieter with their support than usual, so they aren’t supporting their team as best as they usually do, which would flow through to the players who could underperform with diminished support. Ultimately, the more the region drinks, the less likely they are to win. Apparently according to us.
Stats are taken from the Office of National Statistics here.
GURGLER PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS Week 21
Based on our opinion, research, study and ignorance. (In no particular order)
EVERTON to beat Leicester (2-1)
ARSENAL to beat Fulham (3-1)
DRAW – Cardiff v Spurs (1-1)
CHELSEA to beat Southampton (3-1)
BURNLEY to beat Huddersfield (1-0)
DRAW – Bournemouth v Watford (2-2)
BRIGHTON to beat West Ham (2-1)
WOLVES to beat Crystal Palace (2-0)
MANCHESTER UNITED to beat Newcastle (4-1)
LIVERPOOL to beat Manchester City (3-1)
PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS Week 21 – New Year’s Eve Drinking
Based on each team’s regional drinking stats.
EVERTON to beat Leicester
DRAW – Arsenal v Fulham
CARDIFF to beat Spurs
CHELSEA to beat Southampton
BURNLEY to beat Huddersfield
WATFORD to beat Bournemouth
WEST HAM to beat Brighton
WOLVES to beat Crystal Palace
NEWCASTLE to beat Manchester United
DRAW – Manchester City v Liverpool
Premier League Predictions Week 21 Mini Match by Match Preview
Here’s a quick run down of every game for week 21, with a barely interesting stat and a best bet included for those inclined.
EVERTON v LEICESTER
A loss for each of these sides last start, Leicester’s the most surprising given they were at home to Cardiff, ruining the momentum of consecutive wins against Chelsea and Manchester City. Puel will probably be up for the sack again. Everton lost at Brighton, which is no shame given their strength at home. The tight midfield battle of 7th to 13th continues with four points covering them. These two sides (10th and 8th) re right in the thick of it.
Barely Interesting Fact: The home side have won just 6 of the previous 19 matches in this fixture.
“Best” Bet: Both teams to Score @ $1.80
ARSENAL v FULHAM
So Fulham have won another game, timely too as it was against second last, and the three points has seen them rise to within just one point of safety now. Arsenal has their pants pulled down at Liverpool, not a shame given Liverpool’s form these days. A win for Fulham at Arsenal would be rare, in fact it would be a first ever. Can’t see it happening, which probably means Fulham will cause an upset.
Barely Interesting Fact: Fulham have won only seven times against Arsenal – none of them have been away.
“Best” Bet: Arsenal to win @ $1.33
CARDIFF v SPURS
Spurs loss to Wolves was quite the shock last round, especially given they have just assumed the second place that could have propelled them to being a genuine title challenger. Spurs may have the Premier League’s best away form this season (9 wins, 2 losses), but Cardiff have been quite resilient at home recently with four wins from their last six. That along with their surprise win at Leicester last start has seen them rise to a very respectable 16th.
Barely Interesting Fact: Cardiff last beat Spurs back in 1962
“Best” Bet: Under 2.5 Goals @ $1.95
CHELSEA v SOUTHAMPTON
Chelsea just did the job against Crystal Palace, but for all that passing and energy it was only 1-0. You can imagine that this game will be a lot more open. 17 goals in the last five clashes. Hazard is back to his best form, typically at around the same time as the Real Madrid rumours start up again. Southampton have been good since the manager change, and they haven’t fail to score in their last four games against decent competition (Arsenal and Man City).
Barely Interesting Fact: Southampton’s 3-1 upset in 2015 has been followed by seven straight wins for Chelsea.
“Best” Bet: Both teams to score – Yes @ $1.83
BOURNEMOUTH v WATFORD
The last time these sides met it was a shock 4-0 win for Bournemouth, at a time when Watford were flying high. That was part of a good run for Bournemouth too, which has drastically slipped away since. Mainly because the opposition quality increased. Bournemouth have lost eight of their last ten games, Watford have won just two of their last nine. A midfield battle with little consequence at this stage of the season.
Barely Interesting Fact: Seven of the last ten matches in this fixture have been draws.
“Best” Bet: Draw @ $3.40
HUDDERSFIELD v BURNLEY
Huddersfield face a second consecutive game against a bottom three side. The last one didn’t go well (beaten 1-0 by Fulham) and Burnley enter the “six pointer” on the back of a rare but good home win over West Ham. Burnley’s away form is woeful though, with just one win on the road, seven games ago. However Huddersfield have scored the same amount of points at home this season (5 points) and have the worst home record. Huddersfield have scored four at home, Burnley seven away. All you’d expect from a bottom three clash and more.
Barely Interesting Fact: Huddersfield haven’t won this fixture since 2013, in the Championship.
“Best” Bet: Under 2.5 Goals @ $1.54
WEST HAM v BRIGHTON
West Ham are back to being their unpredictable best. Losses you weren’t expecting, wins when you had thought otherwise. At least big Arnie is back for West Ham, one of our favourites. West Ham haven’r beaten Brighton since they arrived back in the EPL, but comparing the sides, they should.
Barely Interesting Fact: Brighton have won the last three matches between these sides, West Ham the three in a row prior to that.
“Best” Bet: Most goals in the second half @ $2.00
WOLVES v CRYSTAL PALACE
Four wins in the past six has seen Wolves claim the Best of the Rest tag. The rest now a club short after Manchester United’s rise. surprisingly, Wolves home record (14 points, -1, 12th) is worse than their away form (15 points, +1, 6th). Though, you can’t complain about Crystal Palace’s last away performance – beating no less than Manchester City.
Barely Interesting Fact: The last Premier League clashes between these sides before this season were in 1981/82. Wolves won both.
“Best” Bet: Crystal Palace to score no goals @ $2.30
NEWCASTLE v MANCHESTER UNITED
It may be against the slightly lesser competition, but you can’t argue against the results since Jose Mourinho was fired. Three wins from three matches and a for and against of 12-3. Of course a lot of that has been driven by Paul Pogba, the problem child under Mourinho. 4 Goals and 3 Assists in the past three matches. Newcastle’s record at home is not great (second worst), but they have been reasonably competitive against a lot of the top six sides this season, and did race out to an early 2-0 lead at old Trafford earlier in the season.
Barely Interesting Fact: Luck Man Utd got rid of Jose Mourinho when they did, he never won at St James’ Park. United last two visits ended in loss and draw.
“Best” Bet: A Goal scored in both halves – Yes @ $1.56
MANCHESTER CITY v LIVERPOOL
Saving the best for last – the weekend’s big, big clash. The outcome will have a big effect on the title battle. A win for Liverpool means they skip a full ten points clear of City. A gap that will be hard to bridge once attention turns to Cup and the Champions League too. Liverpool have now won nine straight, and smashed Arsenal 5-1 last time out. Firminho grabbing an overdue hat trick, just to emphasise the depth of the riches in talent. Manchester City got back to winning ways against Southampton, but prior to that had lost an unthinkable three of their last four.
Barely Interesting Fact: Manchester City have won just two matches in the last 15 between these sides. Liverpool have nine wins.
“Best” Bet: Liverpool to win at the generous $3.40
Last week’s “Best” Bets – 5 / 10
Premier League Predictions week 21 – MMMMMulti
Time to make some money – here’s our best five tips rolled into one money-making machine.
ARSENAL to beat Fulham
CHELSEA to beat Southampton
WOLVES to beat Crystal Palace
MANCHESTER UNITED to beat Newcastle
LIVERPOOL to beat Manchester City
$1 for $16
2018-2019 Premier League Tipping Competition Results
The Gurgler has followed sport very closely in 2018, and why would we let the year finish before offering up the Best and Blurst of the 2018 Sporting Year, in our opinion.
We really did try to follow as many sports as we could in 2018, and with the notable exception of rugby union by choice and US sports by timezone, but we are pretty happy with our efforts and are in a good position to comment on our 2018 Sporting Year review.
There are the usual categories of good things, bad people, and ugly moments, and a few special recognition awards.
So enjoy The Gurgler’s 2018 Sporting Year review.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BEST SPORTING EVENT
We should start off with the glass almost full with the best day/s out in sport in 2018
FOOTBALL WORLD CUP
Nothing beats the Football World Cup, most of the best Football teams in the world playing almost non stop football for a month. Two or three quality games a night in the early stages. Sleepless bliss.
We almost killed ourselves trying to watch and report on every single game and loved every minute of it, despite Socceroo disappointment and English over-hype.
The most deserving team won it, the Final was great, plenty of goals, barely a 0-0 in sight and there were major surprises throughout.
AFL GRAND FINAL
It was a pretty hard final to get into for a neutral – two sides that were not very likeable in West Coast and Collingwood – but the game turned out to be a classic.
Betting always helps in the neutral Grand Final, and the game threw up plenty of value for those in the know. But it went down right to the end, and was tense an exciting throughout.
And Collingwood didn’t win.
MONACO GRAND PRIX
This is biased as to the outsider it was boring as hell, as yet another Monaco Grand Prix saw bugger all overtaking, but for Australian fans it was a nail biter to see if Ricciardo could hang onto his lead. Making up for being robbed previously by his team for the pit stop with no tyres.
COMMONWEALTH GAMES
Despite it being the poor cousin of the Olympics, it was great to see it in South East Queensland, and hopefully a little taster for Brisbane’s future Olympic bid.
FORMULA 2 CHAMPIONSHIP
We anticipate the F2 cars going around almost as much as the F1 cars, if not more each round. With different drivers and teams able to win at most races, it usually produces some exciting racing. Most of the recent batch of F2 Champions to F1 (Leclerc, Gasly) prove the quality of driver is not bad either.
WINNER – FOOTBALL WORLD CUP
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BEST SPORTING MOMENT
This is our favourite sporting moments of 2018, where just for a few minutes or even seconds Sport brought us some great joy.
BENEVENTO KEEPER SCORES IN LAST SECOND OF THE GAME
An obscure moment, but one we saw live and haven’t forgotten. Recently promoted Italian side Benevento had not taken a single point for the season until they faced AC Milan four months and 14 games into the season. Down by a goal with a minute to go and heading to extend their record of consecutive losses to start the season, they had a free kick out wide in their half.
As is customary the keep came for the corner, and unlike every other time, the Benevento goalkeeper Alberto Brignoli nailed it with a diving header to equalise and earn their first point against a giant of the Italian game.
They still got relegated but can keep that moment.
THE FIRST ROUND OF THE HORN-MUNDINE FIGHT
So much talk before the Horn-Mundine fight, as you’d expect from any decent bout in Australia featuring The Man. But seeing him unable to match walk with talk so quickly was a feel good 2018 Sporting Year moment.
We’d like to say we’ll never see him in the ring again, but it’s boxing and of course we will.
IRAN PLAYER’S SOMERSAULT THROW IN ATTEMPT
Down by just a goal in their match against Spain with barely a minute to go, which was an incredibly good position to be in, Iran won a throw-in within their attacking half.
For some reason the Iranian player chose that exact moment to try throw-in where he somersaulted the ball over his head into play. Of course he stuffed, and didn’t release the ball, costing his team a vital 30 seconds at the very end of the game.
EIBAR 3 REAL MADRID 0
We follow some mediocre, obscure and low budget football teams, so a home match to Real Madrid looked a formality.
Not this time, as Eibar punished the European Champions at home, at almost full strength, minus a Ronaldo. It ended up 3-0, but were it not for their goalkeeper Courtois, it would have been even more embarrassing.
WINNER – EIBAR 3 REAL MADRID 0 – one upset for the ages.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – SPORTS PERSON OF THE YEAR
There were plenty of great sporting stars out there in 2018, and we have our thoughts on the very best.
MO SALAH
Luka Modric may have won the footballer of the year, but in our opinion there was no finer footballer this year than Mo Salah for Liverpool. Sure he didn’t play in a World Cup final, and didn’t win a Champions League final, but few could argue about his genius in 2018. The only dip in form was caused by super villain Sergio Ramos in the Champions League final.
LEWIS HAMILTON
There’s plenty to dislike about Lewis Hamilton off track, but on track there is no one better, and given his achievements, he may well end up being referred as the greatest of all time. His 2018 was masterclass in consistent pace. He did have one of the two best cars in the field this season, but compare his season to that of Sebastien Vettel, who fumbled his way out of the Championship race soon enough. So rarely makes a mistake, always a contender, and lucky. Great combination.
ADEBAYO AKINFENWA
Continues to work his lower league magic for Wycombe Wanderers, long after he was not required by AFC Wimbledon for their League One campaign which owed plenty to the Beast’s fine work.
WINNER: Lewis Hamilton.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – 2018 BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT
So much sport is overhyped (like when Gavin Robertson was referred to as a Australian Test Cricket Great around the ball tampering saga), and so many sporting events fail to deliver on the promise or promotion. Here are the worst offenders for the 2018 Sporting Year.
MELBOURNE STORM at 2018 NRL GRAND FINAL
A Roosters-Storm Grand Final didn’t offer up much for most rugby league fans to cheer for outside of the two teams playing, but the game was a big disappointment as Melbourne failed to show anything at all and the Roosters premiership looked inevitable early. Cameron Munster provided some interest to earn two stints in the bin.
DANIEL RICCIARDO SIGNING FOR RENAULT
With the Australian doing a good job against Max Verstappen early in the season, and out of contract for 2019, a lot of big names were being linked with Daniel Ricciardo for a future drive. Then came the shock as he wasn’t neither staying at Red Bull nor going to one of the other big names. It was announced he was going to Renault from 2019, giving him little chance of winning a race, and putting himself up against one of the greatest midfield drivers of all time – Nico Hulkenberg.
QUEENSLAND RUGBY LEAGUE
Queensland sides lost every interstate rugby league series this season. From the State of Origin to the next level representative games like underage, women’s and the NRL State Championship.
MICHAEL SLATER BEING PICKED UP BY EITHER CRICKET COMMENTARY TEAM
At least it made the choice of which channel to watch very easy.
IPSWICH TOWN
For season’s we’ve pointed out their mediocrity, so I guess we got what we wished for, something different. And it appears that difference will be the division for next season. Down to League One, not the riches of the EPL.
AUSTRALIAN CRICKET TEAM
For so many reasons, on field and off.
WINNER – Ricciardo’s signing looks like it has doomed him to no race wins for years.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – JERK OF THE YEAR
We already have the overall 2018 Jerk of the Year, which features many sports stars, so here is the definitive decision on 2018’s biggest sporting jerk.
DAVID WARNER
The mastermind of the Sandpaper affair, the stage managed press conference, the walk off after being sledged, the pathetic mo. All of these are the reason he is running alongside no less a man than Donald Trump for 2018 Jerk of the Year.
BERNARD TOMIC
As ever did all of his best jerk work off court, as he rarely did anything on court in the first half of the 2018 Sporting Year. The appearance on I’m a Celebrity epitomised all that he is about.
KEVIN MAGNUSSEN
The Dane was F1’s Bad Boy in 2018, and he seemed to embrace it. A number of incidents with many drivers in the 2018 season was usually met with an “Up Yours” type response. Good to have a villain in a sport, and better still when they embrace it.
JARRYD HAYNE
Pouted his way through yet nother season, helping Parramatta to the depths of the NRL ladder, just like the Titans in the previous season. Of course played a few decent games late in the hope of another contract, but blew it all with his off field adventures.
SERGIO RAMOS
Never usually the nicest footballer on earth, but his effort in the Champions League final by getting the Liverpool keeper with a sneaky head shot and injuring Mo Salah on purpose was a 90 minute highlights package of his jerk.
GUS GOULD
Whether in the commentary box, going overboard at State of Origin time, or as Penrith Football manager stealing their head coach to keep the son happy and still trying to claim the moral high ground in rugby league shows a real level of jerk.
JOSE MOURINHO
What a miserable c— Jose Mourinho has been in the 2018 Sporting Year. Picking fights with most people involved with Manchester United and the media was never going to end well, and it didn’t last week. Manchester United’s big win at Cardiff in the first week since Jose was gave a little window into whole was causing most of their problems.
WINNER: JOSE MOURINHO – With David Warner set to win overall Jerk of the Year, Jose’s work should be honoured..
2018 SPORTING YEAR – WORST SPORTING MEDIA COVERAGE
For all the great and good sporting media coverage in 2018, there was plenty of bad. Happily the very worst won’t happen again for quite a while.
CHANNEL NEIN’S SUMMER OF CRICKET (CH9)
2018 may have been the last year for Channel Nein broadcasting the cricket for a while (hopefully forever) but that doesn’t mean it was good, watchable, or another other than the disgraceful self love-fest that it ended up as.
AUSTRALIAN OPEN TENNIS (CH7)
Mainly because of Channel 7 and their After the Tennis suite of garbage, but it still stinks anyway. Luckily it is heading to Channel Nein where we’re sure the cross promote and professionalism will be on a par.
STATE OF ORIGIN (CH9)
After dining out on Fox League all season, you realise just how good you have it with Fox League by the time State of Origin rolls around. Being a winning NSW year, Gus Gould accentuated this in 2018 with a typically biased performance. Apparently there was a penalty try. Jerk.
COMMONWEALTH GAMES CLOSING CEREMONY
For eliminating the athletes in favour of other garbage in the Closing ceremony.
SUNDAY AFTER NOON NRL (CH9)
Until it becomes less of two Sydney teams and more of a national competition, it will remain the least watch NRL fixture all season.
PHIL ROTHFIELD
Nominated for Jerk of the Year, and thoroughly deserved. His coverage is mostly negative, and his breaking sport stories are usually awful. His presence in the media is everything that is wrong with Williams.
FOOTY SHOWS (CH9)
2018 finally proved the death of the NRL and AFL Footy shows as the 21st Century finally caught up with them. Both are tired formats, despite the changing of personal, and even less relevant than the were a decade ago. The Sunday edition o the NRL in particular for fat shaming Dave Taylor from the Central Comets showing the heights of their professionalism. Only being sorry for their actions once they found out that people were outraged at them.
WORLD CUP (OPTUS)
Simply put, don’t take on a sporting event’s coverage if you can’t handle. Let alone the biggest sporting tournament in the world. Truly hopeless.
WINNER: Anything Channel Nein produced, especially the Cricket which needs one last boot before we forget they ever had it.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BEST SPORTING MEDIA COVERAGE
The glass was half full for some quality sports coverage this year. But you have to pay for it, mostly.
WORLD CUP (SBS)
Took on all of the World Cup and did it as they always do, sensationally and no fuss. It looked obvious that they weren’t expecting to broadcast all of the games, but thanks to Optus they had to, and did it so well.
BEIN SPORT EUROPEAN FOOTBALL (Foxtel)
If you’re into European football, and of course we are, then Bein Sports is a great weekend companion. More games than one has time for to watch all of them, if there’s a team in the big four leagues from Spain, Germany, Italy, and France you follow, you’ll be able to watch them every week.
FOX LEAGUE (Foxtel)
Once again it was great having to ability to watch all but four games on Fox League, needing to lower ourselves to Channel Nein just the four times for Origin and the Grand Final.
F1 on FOX SPORTS (Foxtel)
Without sounding like an advertisement for Foxtel, to have every session at every race is well worth the money if you’re an F1 aficionado. It is particularly good when you see just how bad the coverage has got on FTA.
FOX CRICKET (Foxtel)
So far, so good, as finally the Summer of Cricket in Australia is watchable again. Letting Channel Seven take Michael Slater was a piece of genius.
FORMULA 2 (Foxtel)
While they have much more exciting action to talk about, the lead commentator Alex Jacques is a great lead commentator with the right amount of everything, and his usual offsider Davide Valsecchi is a delight.
WINNER: All of the above
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BEST SPORTING PODCAST
Podcasts are a great accompaniment to following sports, and here are the ones we recommend.
We never knew we’d enjoy Italian Football as much as we do after this weekly listen.
WINNER: GOLAZZO for something different.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BEST OFF-FIELD MOMENTS
Not all great sporting moments are on field, here are our favourites away from the fields and tracks.
ANNOUNCEMENT THAT CHANNEL NEIN HAD LOST THE CRICKET BROADCASTING RIGHTS
At last, the Australian public could wrestle the Summer of Cricket back from the tossers at Channel Nein who had stolen our game with their incessant love for themselves above all. We are now given a choice of Free but with Michael Slater or pay to hear it without him. Choice is easy.
BANTER BETWEEN PUTIN AND SAUDI KING AT WORLD CUP
Russia flogged Saudi Arabia 5-0 in the World Cup’s opening fixture, and in the executive box was Putin and the Saudi Head of State either side of the FIFA president. After the first few goals went in, there was some playful banter between the pair, with a shrug of the shoulders and a C’est la vie attitude. That wore off as the goals went in, and in ended like a strained family dinner towards the end.
MARADONA’S PERFORMANCE AT WORLD CUP
The camera found their way to Maradona during the World Cup, and he put on some kind of show during one particular game. Giving out rude gestures, accused of being off his face, and ending up being taken from the ground in an ambulance adds up to a very fine day out for the Argentine football legend.
KIMI RAIKKONEN’S PERFORMANCES OFF TRACK
Those who don’t like Kimi are mad. He is short on the usual PR spin of his fellow professionals and doesn’t care, And that’s why we love him.
GEELONG CATS WACKY WEDNESDAY OUTFITS
While NRL players prefer to wear as little as possible, the AFL’s dress ups are legendary, Geelong’s in particular are always the best. Their 2018 offering saw them nominated for September Heroes of the Month.
GREG NORMAN’S PHOTO SHOOT
Has there ever been a more impressive 63 sporting great in the nude? Not likely.
WINNER: GREG NORMAN
2018 SPORTING YEAR – SCARIEST MOMENTS
COMMONWEALTH GAMES MEN’S MARATHON
Seeing the Scotsman leading the pack collapsing and looking dead with a few kilometres to go was awful to watch.
MACAU F3 CRASH
There hasn’t been a motor racing accident quite like it for some time. Luckily, as Sophia Floersch would probably have been dead in another era.
PNG v PM XIII PITCH INVASION
They say Port Moresby can be a dangerous place, and the pitch invasion during the PNG Kumuls clash with the Australian Prime Ministers XIII looked a scary moment at first. Eventually we found out it was because some thought the light pole was falling, and that they mostly just wanted to rub shoulders with the Australian greats. So all good then.
“WINNER” – That Macau GP crash was horrifying.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BIGGEST RIP OFF
NO PNG HUNTERS TV GAMES IN 2018
Despite being the minor premiers, and one of rugby league’s most interesting teams, the QRL and Channel Nein couldn’t find a way to show any of their games.
CRICKET AUSTRALIA
For cancelling the northern tour of Bangladesh over costs to broadcast it, not long after signing a monstrous new deal to broadcast the sport around Australia.
NRL
Concerned more about selling stuff than running the game.
NRL MAGIC WEEKEND
The Magic Weekend works great in the UK as it is over 2 days and is like a carnival, with great match ups. The NRL’s effort, spread over four days, with a Titans-Sharks game to kick it off (that is not included in the three day pass) and having no real high quality head to heads is a poor rip off. But what else could you expect.
NRL NOT TELEVISING PNG v PM’S XIII
More NRL again (they did have a poor year) as they receive our ire for not broadcasting the match between the PNG Kumuls and the Prime Ministers XIII in Port Moresby. PNG were actually quite competitive, or so we could tell from the tilted live Twitter feed of Peter Beattie. The only way to watch the game.
OPTUS WORLD CUP
Truly disastrous attempt to broadcast a sporting tournament, a hopefully a warning to those who delegate coverage in the future that the broadcasters ability to actually show the sport should be tested. At least Optus paid people back for the App, and gave it to everyone for free whilst the World Cup was on.
WINNER: No TV Games for the most interesting side who were defending premiers was a rip off of the highest order. The PNG Hunters and rugby league fans in Queensland were ripped off mega in 2018.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – OVERACHIEVERS
As ever in sport, some people/teams overachieve and we have hand picked our favourites.
SOUTH SYDNEY
Anthony Seibold quickly turned them from lower half plodders to top four powerhouses in a half a season. They were untouchable at times in the middle of the season. Sadly they ween’t great in the finals series, and their preliminary final exit flattered a little. But a great turnaround from the previous years of dross.
CHARLES LECLERC
The 2017 Formula 2 Champion graduated to Formula 1 for 2018 and absolutely killed it in his Sauber. Whilst there was significant improvement in the previously back of the grid wheelbarrow, Leclerc had the car up way higher than it warranted many times, and thrashed his more experienced team mate. He will cause Vettel some problems at Ferrari next season.
PROMOTED SIDES TO EPL
The 2017/18 season saw all three promoted sides survive, and that ran mostly against previous history of promoted teams, and the way each of the three of Newcastle, Brighton and Huddersfield looked going into the season. Wolves are doing well this year too, as expected, and even Cardiff
EIBAR
Our favourite Spanish club continues to punch above its weight. The 3-0 home win to Real Madrid was sensational, and really should have been more.
WINNER: Charles Leclerc, and he was rewarded with a Ferrari contract.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – UNDERPERFORMER
Following on from the over achievers are those who delivered way less than promised, some from an already low base.
WALLABIES
Continue to stink it up on the world stage.
SEBASTIAN VETTEL
Had at minimum the equal best car and either drove poorly or drove into others for a large chunk of the season.
WILLIAMS F1
The former dominant force in F1 were just awful in 2018, and sad to see just how bad it has got.
BRISBANE BRONCOS
With a club who supposedly has on the best coaches of all time, the biggest crowds by a mile, and a city of 1M+ to themselves and all the potential third party agreements they continue to underperform. Their exit in the 2018 finals series to the Dragons at home epitomised that their bad days are very bad and way too frequent.
WINNER: Sebastian Vettel.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – BORE OF THE YEAR
Some things in sport become so tedious that we eventually get bored into angry tears. And here are some of the reasons for those.
FALLOUT OF BALL TAMPERING AFFAIR
All the rolling news coverage, tsk tsking of those who usually have f— all to do with cricket in their talking head role in news programs, the awful press conferences, and the constant updates about the banned players. Especially David Warner.
JOSE MOURINHO
His antics just became boring and sad, as he head for the inevitable play fallout then sack at Manchester United. Thankfully with him gone, football might et some more coverage.
SEASONED NRL JOURNALISTS
Always seem to get the maximum negativity out the sport they cover.
NRL CONTRACTS
The coaching merry go round was so tedious, and unnecessary. The players swapping clubs at the drop of a hat stinks too. As does players who can sign for another club 12 months in advance.
WAYNE BENNETT – ANTHONY SEIBOLD
In particular the childishness of the Wayne Bennett – Anthony Seibold eventual swap. Further to the coaching merry-go-round, Wayne Bennett seems to be getting more cranky with age, and it is no wonder the Broncos weren’t keen n extending him to 2020, nor eventually having him around for 2019.
EX CRICKETERS OPINIONS
They all seem to have one, and there are way too many outlets for them.
ABC GRANDSTAND CRICKET
We used to be big, big fans of the ABC’s cricket coverage, but it is not even delightfully dull these days, it is just plain boring. What used to be required listening on workday has now been replaced by Cricinfo updates.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – THE FAMILY KARMA AWARD
MAX VERSTAPPEN
After he was knocked out of the lead at the Brazilian Grand Prix. This was the same track just under 20 years previously where his father slammed Juan Montoya up the back and knocked him out of the race whilst leading. At least Max recovered to finish second.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – THE ANNASTACIA PALASZCZUK AWARD FOR RIGHT PLACE, RIGHT TIME
TIM PAINE
Tim Paine ends up Australian captain In the fallout of the ball tampering in South Africa. A moderate record at best. The luckiest leader since the current Queensland Premier fell into the Prenier’s gig in 2015.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – MOST MEDIOCRE TEAM
IPSWICH TOWN
Won once again by the team which says mediocre more than anyone. At least they are trying to avoid that title for 2019 as their disastrous season unwinds towards the third division. But don’t say I told you so about getting rid of Mick McCarthy, because we don’t attend live game, we aren’t llowed an opinion.
2018 SPORTING YEAR – THE AFTER THE TENNIS AWARD FOR MOST OVERHYPED EVENT
FORMULA E
Championed as the future of Motorsport, it is another crack t a summer series featuring talent just below the surface of F1. Racing is no better than F1, and the fact they have to change an entire car at a pitstop ruins the flow.
The Premier League Football is coming thick and fast, and here are our Premier League Predictions Week 20 for the last time this calendar year.
Every week we offer up our Premier League predictions, along with a mini preview of each match, with a few best bets in an alternative Premier League preview.
We also put our tips up against a competitor, usually not human though, and based on some football stat or general life. This week our tipping opponent is based on each team’s form for the 2018 Calendar year.
It’s a lot like the BBC’s Lawros tips, but better. Arguably.
Premier League Predictions Week 20 – Gurgler v 2018
TIPS BACKGROUND: Since our Premier League Predictions Week 20 are for the very last matchday of 2018, why not use every team’s 2018 form as a way to decide tips.
We have the record for each club this calendar, with only the odd mild surprise thrown up. Manchester United have had a better 2018 than you would have thought, and three teams ended up on the same total of points at the top – Liverpool, Manchester City and Spurs. Spurs had played one more game.
We have used average points per game to cover the different amount of games played, especially with promoted Championship sides. The full list in order is at the end. Of course the higher the average points between the teams, that team gets the tip.
Are our tips good enough to beat those based on 2018? Keep reading and find out.
GURGLER PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS WEEK 20
Based on our opinion, research, study and ignorance. (In no particular order)
DRAW – Brighton v Everton (1-1)
FULHAM to beat Huddersfield (2-0)
LEICESTER to beat Cardiff (3-1)
SPURS to beat Wolves (3-0)
WATFORD to beat Newcastle (2-1)
LIVERPOOL to beat Arsenal (4-1)
CHELSEA to beat Crystal Palace (2-0)
DRAW – Burnley v West Ham (1-1)
MANCHESTER CITY to beat Southampton (3-2)
MANCHESTER UNITED to beat Bournemouth (4-0)
PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS WEEK 20 – 2018 FORM
Based on each team’s form in 2018. Average points per game in brackets.
EVERTON (1.36) to beat Brighton (1.11)
FULHAM (1.57) to beat Huddersfield (0.64)
CARDIFF (1.45) to beat Leicester (1.45)
SPURS (2.29) to beat Wolves (1.67)
DRAW – Watford (1.19) v Newcastle (1.19)
LIVERPOOL (2.36) to beat Arsenal (1.75)
CHELSEA (1.80) to beat Crystal Palace (1.22)
WEST HAM (1.33) to beat Burnley (0.88)
MANCHESTER CITY (2.36) to beat Southampton (0.89)
MANCHESTER UTD (1.91) to beat Bournemouth (1.39)
Premier League Predictions Week 20 Mini Match by Match Preview
Here’s a quick run down of every game for Week 20, with a barely interesting stat and a best bet included for those inclined.
BRIGHTON v EVERTON
Brighton once again proved that they are formidable at home to any team, a draw against Arsenal the latest. Everton visit on the weekend and they are hot off a big 5-1 away win at Burnley, which was just their second win in nine way matches this season. Talking of two, Brighton have lost just twice this season at home – to Spurs and Chelsea 2-1.
Barely Interesting Fact: Brighton have beaten Everton just the once – in 1982.
“Best” Bet: Everton to score the last goal @ $1.72
FULHAM v HUDDERSFIELD TOWN
The battle of the basement for two teams that look almost past saving. A draw at Newcastle and home to Wolves in their last two games is progress, certainly only conceding one goal, but they will need to pick up the pace if they are to survive. The feel good factor and hopes in Claudio Ranieri remain, but lose to Huddersfield at home and that will evaporate. Huddersfield sadly have played two clubs in two weeks that had just fired their manager, and so were on the receiving end of new manager bounce. Perhaps a bout of delayed N.M.B. is coming this weekend.
Barely Interesting Fact: Huddersfield won this season’s earlier fixture, but before then their last win was in 1993 in the third division.
“Best” Bet: Both teams to score – No @ $1.72
LEICESTER CITY v CARDIFF CITY
Claude Puel is some sort of Houdini, going from almost sacked with a player revolt looming to back to back victories over Chelsea and Manchester City. Plenty of Christmas cheer for the Foxes, and who wouldn’t begrudge them some on field success after losing their beloved owner recently. Leicester are now up to seventh, topping the best of the rest battle for at least a week. Cardiff have just two points on the road this season, so a third consecutive win for Leicester looks likely, as does an extended stay for Puel, for now.
Barely Interesting Fact: Cardiff are one of two teams without an away win, Leicester have conceded the third fewest goals at home this season.
“Best” Bet: Jamie Vardy to score anytime @ $1.83
SPURS v WOLVES
Tottenham are now second, jumping ahead of Manchester City and on a five game winning streak where they have scored 17-3. Imagine how they’ll go if they ever get their new ground. Star of the recent show has been Son for Spurs, but he will be off on Asian Cup duty soon, and they will miss his recent late contributions. Wolves are still comfortably the best promoted side this year and deserve their spot in the midfield bunch. They were competitive against Spurs last time, losing 3-2, but they face a Spurs full of confidence and in form..
Barely Interesting Fact: Wolves last win over Spurs was on their previous visit to the Premier League in 2009/2010.
“Best” Bet: Spurs to win @ $1.30
WATFORD v NEWCASTLE
Watford surprised a few by beating West Ham at the London Stadium two matches ago, and their last effort losing to Chelsea was admirable. But they are hit and miss at home – 10 matches, five wins and five losses. Perhaps Newcastle will get lucky and it is one of the off days. They will need Watford to be off as they can’t really rely on too many goals to win, having scored just seven goals in nine away matches.
Barely Interesting Fact: Before this season’s clash, Watford had won the last five meetings against Newcastle. They have only ever lost once at home to Newcastle.
“Best” Bet: Watford or Newcastle to win (basically no draw) @ $1.25
LIVERPOOL v ARSENAL
The weekend’s big ticket game, and going on previous matches it should live up to the hype. Pity about the awful timeslot for those outside of Europe. It is starting to look like this is the season for Liverpool, they are getting better each week, and have been handed the gifts of two surprise Manchester City losses in a row. They have a six point gap to Spurs and seven to Manchester City now. Another six points further back is Arsenal, who have interestingly scored just two fewer goals than Liverpool this season. It is the 18 more goals they conceded which is the difference.
Barely Interesting Fact: Eight of the last 11 games between these two sides has seen 4+ goals.
“Best” Bet: Over 2.5 Goals @ $1.50
CRYSTAL PALACE v CHELSEA
Anyone who thought Crystal Palace would have broken a near 30 year record against Manchester City could be a very profitable friend indeed. That upset was two games ago, they could only manage a 0-0 draw at home to Cardiff last start, a slightly underwhelming result. Chelsea beat fellow London club Watford away last start, and had an inspired Eden Hazard to thank for that win. Wasn’t long ago though, that Chelsea lost to both Spurs and Wolves in consecutive away games.
Barely Interesting Fact: Crystal Palace fare better than you would think in this clash – the last 10 games is 6-4 in Chelsea’s favour.
“Best” Bet: Half with most goals – 2nd Half @ $2.00
BURNLEY v WEST HAM
A tough run for Burnley has seen them suffer increasingly bigger losses to Arsenal, Everton and Spurs and sees them in the bottom three and are three points adrift in 18th now. They face West Ham, who are one of the Premier League’s hardest teams to follow form-wise, and our selection here is simply a guess that we changed three times before settling on whatever it ended up.
Barely Interesting Fact: Burnley have not beaten West Ham at home since 2010, in a previous visit to the EPL.
“Best” Bet: Burnley to score the first goal.
SOUTHAMPTON v MANCHESTER CITY
All of a sudden Manchester City are off the rails with three losses in four games and consecutive losses to Leicester and Crystal Palace. They sit in 10th in the last six form, just one place above Southampton who have turned things around nicely with their new manager. Southampton are equal fourth for goals scored in their last six games too – 11 goals – the same as City. After they beat Arsenal a few games back at home, another upset here wouldn’t be that surprising.
Barely Interesting Fact: Southampton have Manchester City at home recently – in 2016.
“Best” Bet: Over 3.5 Goals @ $2.39
MANCHESTER UNITED v BOURNEMOUTH
Manchester United and Paul Pogba mission to prove that removing Jose Mourinho was a good idea will no doubt continue into the New Year. United have won their last two games 5-1 and 3-1, scoring almost 25% of their season goals in the last two games. Pogba too looks more like the French World Cup winning hero than the overpriced bench warmer he had become. A woeful time for Bournemouth to visit after being flogged by Spurs a few days prior.
Barely Interesting Fact: Bournemouth have won once in seven meetings with Manchester United.
“Best” Bet: Manchester United -2.0 Handicap (win by three goals or more) @ $3.60
Last week’s Boxing Day “Best” Bets – 7 from 9 (Southampton v West Ham result pending)
Premier League Predictions Week 20 – MMMMMulti
Time to make some money – here’s our best five tips rolled into one money-making machine.
FULHAM to beat Huddersfield
LEICESTER to beat Cardiff
SPURS to beat Wolves
LIVERPOOL to beat Arsenal
MANCHESTER UNITED to beat Bournemouth
$1 for $8
2018-2019 Premier League Tipping Competition Results
The great Boxing Day Sport Sloth-a-thon is here, a day where live sport stretches out across more than a day straight. Grab a lounge, some drinks, and a nap.
After the great Festival of the Fork and Glass, one does need to take it easy on Boxing Day, and thankfully most sports around the world oblige with the Great Boxing Day Sport Sloth-a-thon.
The Great Boxing Day Sport covers more than 24 hours, going from a reasonable 3am (AEST), all the way through to the next sunrise and beyond.
What else are you going do after a big Christmas Day?
Grab a lounge and a remote and sloth the day and night away with sport.
Great Boxing Day Sport Sloth-a-thon Highlights
If you like NBA and 3am, there’s the first of five straight games of basketball to kick off the big day of sport, the poor basketballers playing on their Christmas Day for our amusement half a world way.
The big event of course is the Boxing Day test from the MCG, with a home Test Series looking evenly balanced for a change. There’s also way more cricket with Test Matches from everywhere and the Big Bash.
Of course no Boxing Day Sport Sloth-a0thon would be complete without people pretending to know something about sailing as the Sydney to Hobart jets off t some time convenient to avoid the cricket at the MCG.
As the evening closes in, those fans of A League and NBL, and why wouldn’t you be, will have something to watch. It’s a good night for Adelaide sporting fans with their Cricket, Football and Basketball team in action.
Finally there’s a full book of Premier League, Serie A from Italy, and all the divisions from England to follow the scores and watch the occasional game.
Can you watch it all? Only for the most diehard and childless sports fans out there.
Boxing Day Sport Sloth-a-thon Full Schedule
Time Day Channel Sport Event
3:00 Boxing Day FoxSports3 Drones Drones Champions League
3:15 Boxing Day ESPN NBA Knicks v Bucks
6:00 Boxing Day ESPN NBA Rockets v Thunder
6:00 Boxing Day FoxCricket TestMatch 2nd Test 2 Hour Review
8:00 Boxing Day FoxSports5 Darts World Championships
8:30 Boxing Day ESPN NBA Celtic v 76ers
8:30 Boxing Day FoxCricket TestMatch Boxing Day Test
10:35 Boxing Day FoxSports7 TestMatch NZ v Sri Lanka
11:00 Boxing Day ESPN NBA Warriors v Lakers
11:30 Boxing Day 7Mate Yachting Sydney to Hobart
13:30 Boxing Day ESPN NBA Jazz v Trail Blazers
17:58 Boxing Day FoxSports3 TestMatch South Africa v Pakistan
18:15 Boxing Day FoxCricket BBL Perth v Adelaide
18:45 Boxing Day FoxSports5 Aleague Adelaide v WSW
18:50 Boxing Day FoxSports6 NBL Melbourne v Adelaide
21:20 Boxing Day BeinSports1 SerieA Frosinone v AC Milan
21:40 Boxing Day FoxCricket WBBL Perth v Brisbane
23:50 Boxing Day BeinSports1 SerieA Atalanta v Juventus
23:55 Boxing Day BeinSports3 SPFL Aberdeen v Celtic
0:30 Boxing Day +1 SBS EPL FTA – Liverpool v Newcastle
0:55 Boxing Day +1 BeinSports2 EFL Norwich v Nottingham Forest
1:00 Boxing Day +1 Optus EPL Multiple Matches
2:50 Boxing Day +1 BeinSports1/3 SerieA Roma v Sassuolo / Torino v Emploi
5:20 Boxing Day +1 BeinSports1 SerieA Inter v Napoli
5:20 Boxing Day +1 BeinSports2 EFL Sheffield Utd v Derby
As if Christmas wasn’t enough, there is a whole bunch of Boxing Day Premier League fixtures waiting, and as ever so are our Boxing Day Premier League predictions.
Every week we offer up our Premier League predictions, along with a mini preview of each match, with a few best bets in an alternative Premier League preview.
We also put our tips up against a competitor, usually not human though and based on some football stat or general life. This week our tipping opponent is based on each teams form on the five previous Boxing days.
It’s a lot like the BBC’s Lawros tips, but better. Arguably.
Boxing Day Premier League Predictions – Gurgler v Boxing Day
TIPS BACKGROUND: We’ve had some elaborate tipping opposition this season so far, time for something nice and simple.
We have the record for each club on Boxing Day from the past five seasons (covering EFL as well) and the team with the best performance over the five previous Boxing Days gets the tip. The full record is at the end of this preview.
Are our tips good enough to beat those based on Boxing Day? Keep reading and find out.
GURGLER BOXING DAY PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS WEEK 19
DRAW – Fulham v Wolves (1-1)
MANCHESTER CITY to beat Leicester (2-1)
CRYSTAL PALACE To beat Cardiff (1-0)
LIVERPOOL to beat Newcastle (3-0)
MANCHESTER UNITED to beat Huddersfield (5-0)
EVERTON to beat Burnley (2-1)
SPURS to beat Bournemouth (3-0)
DRAW – Brighton v Arsenal (1-1)
DRAW – Watford v Chelsea (2-2)
SOUTHAMPTON to beat West Ham (3-1)
BOXING DAY PREMIER LEAGUE PREDICTIONS WEEK 19 – BOXING DAY FORM
Avg points from last 5 Boxing Days in brackets.
WOLVES (2.6) to beat Fulham (2.4)
CRYSTAL PALACE (1.0) to beat Cardiff (0.6)
MAN CITY (3.0) to beat Leicester (0.6)
LIVERPOOL (2.4) to beat Newcastle (0.6)
MAN UTD (2.0) to beat Huddersfield (0.8)
DRAW – Burnley (1.4) v Everton (1.4)
SPURS (2.6) to beat Bournemouth (1.6)
ARSENAL (2.4) to beat Brighton (1.6)
CHELSEA (2.6) to beat Watford (1.6)
SOUTHAMPTON (1.8) to beat West Ham (1.0)
BOXING DAY PREMIER LEAGUE MINI PREVIEW
Here is the quickest of rundowns of each match for this round of the Premier League, with a barely interesting stat and a best bet.
FULHAM v WOLVES
A first match up this season between two of the sides promoted from the Championship with high hopes and big promise. Sadly, only Wolves have lived up to the hype thus far in the Premier League. The hiring of Claudio Ranieri hasn’t really turned things around yet for Fulham, but a clean sheet in Newcastle is progress. Wolves’ 2-0 loss to leaders Liverpool on Friday night is no shame, they remain in the six team midfield pack separated by three points in 10th.
Barely Interesting Fact: The last EPL clash between the two sides ended in a 5-0 win to Fulham. Honours were even last year in the Championship with 2-0 wins to the home side on both occasions.
“Best” Bet: Double Chance – Wolves or Draw @ $1.35
LEICESTER v MANCHESTER CITY
Leicester City have managed to do something that Manchester City have been unable to do this year – beat Chelsea. Coincidentally the other surprise results from the weekend was Manchester City’s loss to Crystal Palace. This is a replay of the League Cup quarter final played less than a week ago, which ended in a 1-1 draw. City won on penalties, and will probably take less time to achieve the result for Boxing Day. However, Claude Puel, who seems inevitably to be the next manager sacked may have bought some time with the unexpected win against Chelsea. At least until 2019 that is.
Barely Interesting Fact: The last two matches between these two sides in Leicester were League Cup fixtures that ended in 1-1. Prior the Leicester’s title winning season, Leicester last beat City in 1987.
“Best” Bet: Manchester City to win @ $1.35
CRYSTAL PALACE v CARDIFF CITY
Two teams meet that were on opposite results of matches against Manchester sides on the weekend. Cardiff were unlucky to be the first team to play United the game after Jose Mourinho was given the arse, and the very predictable sensational performance was in evidence. Crystal Palace caused the upset of the season so far by coming from behind and winning 3-2 against Manchester City. Perhaps helping Liverpool to the title a few years after costing them one.
Barely Interesting Fact: In their only meeting in the top flight, 2013-14 saw Crystal Palace win 3-0 and 2-0.
“Best” Bet: Under 2.5 Goals @ $1.89
LIVERPOOL v NEWCASTLE UNITED
Happy days for Liverpool as they top the table at Christmas, helped to a four point gap by Manchester City’s loss to Crystal Palace. Current Newcastle manager Rafa Benitez can only look at his former club with envy as he tries to steer his lesser equipped side away from relegation. A draw at home to last placed Fulham is not the worst result in the world, but you can’t see them getting three points at Liverpool despite being competitive against the top six sides this season.
Barely Interesting Fact: Liverpool are unbeaten at home to Newcastle since 1994 – 17 wins and 4 draws. And they have scored 2+ goals in all but two of those home fixtures.
“Best” Bet: Only Liverpool to score @ $1.76
MANCHESTER UNITED v HUDDERSFIELD TOWN
What a performance against Cardiff for Manchester United, proving beyond doubt that everything was Jose’s fault. OK, not quite, but there is a certain amount of coincidence about it. What luck for United’s new manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer too, to take over with United’s current run of fixtures. Next up is Huddersfield, who have just the one win away from home this year, and who are without a win in five matches.
Barely Interesting Fact: Huddersfield surprised Manchester United with a 2-1 win at home last season in the first season in the top flight for decades. You have to go even further back for the next win against United – 1952.
“Best” Bet: Manchester United -1.5 Handicap @ $1.69
BURNLEY v EVERTON
An interesting battle lies ahead at Turf Moor, Burnley are stuck in the relegation zone, and with the teams above them finding some form, it is becoming a bit of a worry for last season’s surprise team. Everton are on the shorter turnaround after playing Sunday, but luckily Burnley is not too far away.
Barely Interesting Fact: Burnley have actually won three of the past four matches in this fixture.
“Best” Bet: Burnley to score the first goal @ $2.76
SPURS v BOURNEMOUTH
Interesting to see if the hanging threat of losing their manager to Manchester United will affect Spurs in the second half of the season, irony too if it does and the Red Devils are the ones to take advantage. That looks unlikely given that Spurs have so many great attacking weapons. Bournemouth’s 2-0 win over Brighton arrested a three game losing streak, but a win at Wembley looks as unlikely as Spurs slip from the top four.
Barely Interesting Fact: Bournemouth’s 0-0 draw with Spurs in 2016 is the only time they’ve avoided defeat. Spurs have scored 3+ goals all in but one of those victories.
“Best” Bet: Spurs 1.5 Handicap @ $1.95
BRIGHTON v ARSENAL
Arsenal’s win over Burnley on the weekend stopped a two game losing streak in League and League Cup, previously they had gone undefeated since the second weekend of the year. Visiting Brighton though is no easy gig, and they both have the same record – Brighton at home and Arsenal away this season – (4W 2D 2L).
Barely Interesting Fact: Brighton have won their last three home matches against Arsenal – last season, then a gap to 1982 and 1983.
“Best” Bet: Both teams to score – Yes @ $1.74
WATFORD v CHELSEA
A second consecutive London match for Watford, and after Chelsea’s recent woes on the road (they have lost every second game away recently) they are due another loss based on that stat. After a winless run of five games, Watford are back in business with two straight wins, and have knocked off some good opposition at home this season.
Barely Interesting Fact: Watford have only beaten Chelsea once this century. Last year’s fixtures saw a 4-1 win for Chelsea.
“Best” Bet: Watford or Draw @ $2.10
SOUTHAMPTON v WEST HAM
Southampton are the now the free scoring winners that they could never have been under the grumpy Mark Hughes, everyone is loving their new manager Ralph Hasenhuttl at the moment for the breath of fresh air he brings. That will run out as the fixtures get tougher, but why not enjoy the current ride. West Ham’s great winning streak was abruptly halted at home to Watford on the weekend, and they return to the Premier League’s most unpredictable side.
Barely Interesting Fact: 60% of Southampton’s goals have come in the last two games.
The weekend is here and that means it is time for us to offer up our quick European Football Highlights for the weekend.
Some might call our European Football Highlights hipster football, we don’t, it’s pure sports nerd and football goodness. Give us an Eibar, Sassuolo, or Borussia Monchengladbach any day.
This weekend the big game is on a Friday night again with 1st v 2nd in the Bundesliga between the two Borussia sides of Dortmund and Monchengladbach. There’s also third placed Bayern Munich v fifth place Eintracht Frankfurt in a big weekend for the German top five.
It is the last weekend of all the leagues before they take a winter break, so enjoy this weekend while you can.
But if you have a life and can’t watch everything, we offer up our quick European Football Highlights, to help you follow the best of it, without the need to stay up for absolutely everything. With added TV times
Quick European Football Highlights Week 17 – The Matches
Here are the minimum of games worth keeping an eye on in our opinion.
There are TV Times for those in Australia lucky enough with Bein Sports.
BUNDESLIGA – DORTMUND v MONCHENGLADBACH EURO KICK KICK OFF – FRIDAY EVENING
A great match early in the weekend featuring two sides at the top of the Bundesliga covered currently by 6 points and just under 100km apart. Dortmund were beaten for the first time this season in the league by lowly Fortuna Dusseldorf during the week, so perhaps this is the best time to meet the league leaders. Our favourite German team – Monchengladbach – could reduce the gap to just three points with a win. But looming are giants Bayern Munich on equal points as Monchengladbach, ready to spoil any party that involves a different team winning the league.
Both teams averaging well over 2 goals scored per game this season, so there should be plenty of goals. Dortmund have won the past six matches between these sides, scoring 21 goals and conceding just five.
Prediction: Draw 2-2 TV – Bein Sports Australia Kick Off Time – Saturday ADST 6:20am Bein Sports 2
LA LIGA – REAL BETIS v EIBAR EURO KICK KICK OFF – SUNDAY LUNCHTIME
Biased again we know, but no European Football Highlights would be complete without little Eibar. Ever the entertainers, they head to Sevilla to play Real Betis this weekend in another convenient early kick off. Eibar’s record away this year is terrible, currently the third worst in La Liga, but they are the only team to have a win in this fixture away from home. Real Betis are in great form winning their last three and only Barcelona and Levante have scored more goals in the last six games. We’re hoping for a Christmas miracle and a second Eibar away win for the season.
Prediction: Eibar 2-1 TV – Bein Sports Australia Kick Off Time – Saturday ADST 10:55pm Bein Sports 2
SERIE A – AC MILAN v FIORENTINA EURO KICK KICK OFF – SATURDAY AFTERNOON
Following on nicely from the Eibar game is a clash between two of a big group of sides chasing the elusive fourth place and final Champions League spot in Serie A. Despite only losing 1 game of their last six, neither side is in especially wonderful form, with lots of draw in the recent weeks. Interesting will be if any big Italian club (like Milan, Inter, Roma, Lazio) continues a losing run, with the looming shadow of an out of work Jose Mourinho.
Milan haven’t lost this home fixture since 2013, although that was the third year straight that it happened for Fiorentina. The overall Head to Head record is 19-14.
Prediction: Draw 1-1 TV – Bein Sports Australia Kick Off Time – Sunday ADST 0:50am Bein Sports 1
SERIE A – JUVENTUS v ROMA EURO KICK KICK OFF – SATURDAY EVENING
The match up of the two Italian sides that made it through to knockout stages of the Champions League, Roma getting the easier of the two match ups with Porto compared to Juve’s waiting clash with Atletico Madrid. Juventus look like they’re going to do the Serie A title easily, but that doesn’t mean they’re likely to take it easier, especially with a Cristiano Ronaldo in the side. One draw is their only blemish from their first 16 games. Roma alternatively are not going great, sitting in seventh, three points from fourth. Their away record isn’t great either at just over a point a game, and two wins all seasons away.
Prediction: Juventus 2-0 TV – Bein Sports Australia Kick Off Time – Saturday ADST 6:20am Bein Sports 1
LA LIGA – BARCELONA v CELTA VIGO EURO KICK KICK OFF – SATURDAY AFTERNOON
This match may appear a little lop-sided on paper, but it does feature four of La Liga’s top five goals scorers. The usual suspects of Messi and Suarez for Barca, and Celta’s Aspas and Gomez have 43 goals between them this season. Barcelona unsurprisingly sit on top of La Liga, having got over their speed bump of bad results now, Celta Vigo are firmly in a midfield bunch of eight teams covered by just three points.
Celta Vigo have a decent record against Barcelona at home, but less so away. In fact three of the last four games at the Camp Nou have ended in 5 goal victories for Barcelona.
Prediction: Barcelona 5-1 TV – Bein Sports Australia Kick Off Time – Sunday ADST 4:25am Bein Sports 2
Quick European Football Highlights Week 17 – The Big 10 Multi
Here are our favourite tips from all of the European football this weekend. We try to pack as many tips in there as possible, just so we can fall one short.
ATLETICO to beat Espanyol
BARCELONA to beat Celta Vigo
SEVILLA to beat Leganes
DRAW – Milan v Fiorentina
NAPOLI to beat SPAL
JUVENTUS to bt Rom
SAMPDORIA to beat Empoli
BAYERN MUNICH to beat Eintracht Frankfurt
HOFFENHEIM to beat Mainz
PSG to beat Nantes
$1 for $121
Quick European Football Highlights – The Tables
Haven’t caught up with all of the tables in a while? Why not now.
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With the huge distractions of Joe Mourinho’s sacking and last minute Christmas shopping, you could forgive us if we forgot to give our Premier League Predictions Week 18.
Every week we offer up tips, a mini preview, betting advice and an alternative view on the Premier League.
It’s a lot like BBC’s Lawro vs Somebody preview, but better and with more stuff. Arguably.
Premier League Predictions Week 18 – Gurgler v Christmas Shopping in the UK
Opponent Tips Background: Since it’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, or has done for some time, we are due to use the festive season as a method of tipping Premier League winners.
Since there’s not much to work with, we’re using the Christmas spend around the UK’s areas to determine the winners. This article has the average Xmas spend by region, and picking a winner is easy – the more that the area spends – the happier they are – so the more likely their team will win.
Premier League Predictions Week 18
Premier League Predictions Week 18 – The Gurgler House Tips
LIVERPOOL to beat Wolves (1-0)
ARSENAL to beat Burnley (2-0)
BOURNEMOUTH to beat Brighton (2-0)
CHELSEA to beat Leicester (2-0)
SOUTHAMPTON to beat Huddersfield (2-0)
MANCHESTER CITY to beat Crystal Palace (4-0)
FULHAM to beat Newcastle (2-1)
WEST HAM to beat Watford (2-1)
DRAW – Cardiff v Man Utd (1-1)
DRAW – Everton v Spurs (2-2)
Premier League Predictions Week 18 v Christmas Shopping in the UK
Average Xmas spend in GBP in brackets.
LIVERPOOL (536.03) to beat Wolves (443.67)
ARSENAL (456.57) to beat Burnley (425.25)
BRIGHTON (398.53) to beat Bournemouth (395.93)
CHELSEA (456.57) to beat Leicester (440.13)
SOUTHAMPTON (395.93) to beat Huddersfield (344.95)
CRYSTAL PALACE (456.57) to beat Manchester City (425.25)
FULHAM (456.57) to beat Newcastle (420.97)
DRAW – West Ham (456.57) v Watford (456.57)
CARDIFF (492.39) to beat Manchester Utd (425.25)
EVERTON (536.03) to beat Spurs (456.57)
Midweek Premier League Predictions Week 18 Quick Mini Preview
GAME BY GAME PREVIEW IN A FEW WORDS OR SOMETIMES MORE.
WOLVES v LIVERPOOL
Friday night Football again. An enticing preview to the upcoming FA Cup third round between the two sides at the same ground. Two in form teams, Liverpool – league leaders, unbeaten, and on six game winning streak, and Wolves are back on track with three straight wins. Wolves have conceded the fifth fewest goals this season, but have let in almost three times as many as Liverpool.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: The away team has won four of the last five of these fixtures going back to 2010.
BEST BET: Under 2.5 Goals @ $1.95
ARSENAL v BURNLEY
Both of these teams have played Spurs in the last week, Burnley in a narrow 1-0 loss, and Arsenal in the League Cup in midweek. The Gunners lost their first game since the second round against Southampton last weekend, which coincidentally pushed Burnley back into the bottom three. Arsenal can ensure they remain in the relegation zone.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Burnley haven’t beaten Arsenal in the League since 1974, although they did beat them in the League Cup in 2008.
BEST BET: Under 1.5 Goals in the first half @ $1.65
BOURNEMOUTH v BRIGHTON
Two clubs meet that have come a long way to be almost regular Premier League mainstays, last year being the first top flight meetings between the two. Neither side are in sparkling form, Brighton’s four losses in seven, slightly better than Bournemouth’s six losses in seven games. Not many teams have a worse goals per away game record than Brighton.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Bournemouth haven’t lost this head to head since Brighton won 3-2 in League One in 2008.
BEST BET: Ryan Fraser to score anytime @ $4.00
CHELSEA v LEICESTER
A battle between the last two Premier League champions before Manchester City, Chelsea are hanging onto fourth place, Leicester are right in the midfield bunch. Chelsea are unbeaten at home this season with six wins and three draws, Leicester have lost their last two matches, the first defeats since the death of their beloved owner.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Leicester have only beaten Chelsea twice this century, despite winning that unlikely title.
BEST BET: CHELSEA with -1.0 Handicap @ $1.91
HUDDERSFIELD v SOUTHAMPTON
Suddenly Southampton don’t look busted arse but exciting. Their win over Arsenal has been coming, and they will look on this weekend’s Huddersfield game as a big chance to clear away from the drop zone at the expense of a rival. Their new manager Ralph Hasenhüttl – the Alpine Klopp apparently – looks a real livewire and a person to liven up the sideline. Huddersfield turnaround in results has ended as they have now lost four in a row.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Huddersfield are scoring at a goal every three games at home.
BEST BET: Southampton to win @ $2.40
MANCHESTER CITY v CRYSTAL PALACE
Crystal Palace did the unthinkable last weekend and won without Wilfried Zaha, but beating Manchester City is probably a step too far. Especially since they welcome back Kevin de Bruyne. With Liverpool having a tricky away match at Wolves, City could take back the EPL lead again this weekend.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Crystal Palace haven’t beaten Manchester City in Manchester since 1990. The last five matches for City v Palace at home have seen wins of 5-0, 5-0, 4-0, 5-1, 3-0.
BEST BET: 1st Half – 3 or more goals @ $4.25
NEWCASTLE v FULHAM
Mitrovic was sold to Fulham by Newcastle in the summer after helping them to win promotion last season from the Championship, and they’ve never needed goals more from him than now. It’s clear it will take a great deal of time to stop conceding goals, so they need to score plenty. Newcastle skipped four points clear of the drop after beating Huddersfield away, but their home form is woeful, six points from 27 is the second worst return.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Fulham have a very good record v Newcastle, they have won the last three matches, including a Championship double on Newcastle’s last visit to the second division. The record since 2000 is Fulham 14, Newcastle 9 and 3 draws.
BEST BET: Over 2.5 Goals @ $1.87
WEST HAM v WATFORD
This London match up should at least be entertaining. Both teams have impressed this season, just at different times. West Ham are going gangbusters currently with four wins in a row being very rare these days. Watford were in the top four and beating current top four sides earlier in the year, but last weekend’s win broke a six game winless streak. Coincidentally they are 9th and 10th.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: These two sides currently have the same wins, draw, losses and goals against. West Ham have scored two more goals to deny complete parity.
BEST BET: No first half goals @ $3.12
CARDIFF v MANCHESTER UNITED
This might be a danger game for Manchester United, sacked Jose or not. Cardiff have won four of their last five games at home, Manchester United have won just once on the road in their last six games. We now get to see if it was all Jose, or if the clean out will continue in January. For sure early season favourite for first boss sacked – Neil Warnock – will likely be enjoying seeing yet another manager biting the dust before him. If their home form continues, perhaps Warnock will see a second consecutive season as a Premier Manager for the first time.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: Cardiff last beat Man Utd in 1960.
BEST BET: Man Utd to win @ $1.53
EVERTON v TOTTENHAM
The most entertaining game in our eyes this weekend, a pity it is on at the worst possible time for those outside of Europe. Everton are unbeaten at home in their last six games. Spurs are the best team away from home this season.
BARELY INTERESTING STAT: The last time Everton beat Spurs David Moyes was in charge
BEST BET: Over 2.5 Goals @ $1.74
(Last week’s “Best” Bets – 4/10)
Midweek Premier League Three Bold Predictions Week 18
Everything to be Jose Mourinho’s fault.
The new manager bounce courtesy of the Alpine Klopp to continue.
We’re tipping Fulham for the last time this season.
Premier League Predictions Week 18 – MMMMMulti
Time to make some money – here’s our best five tips rolled into one money-making machine.
ARSENAL to beat Burnley
BOURNEMOUTH to beat Brighton
CHELSEA to beat Leicester
SOUTHAMPTON to beat Huddersfield
MANCHESTER CITY to beat Crystal Palace
$1 for $8
2018-2019 Premier League Tipping Competition Results
The big Hero & Jerk of the Year 2018 poll deserves a big effort from The Gurgler team, and nothing is bigger than an almost 40 minute podcast.
Recorded live from the pleasant surroundings of our live broadcast location of exhaust pipe level Petrie Terrace, Frankington Stanley joins Kaaps Loche to run through the form guide for Jerk of the Year 2018 and Hero of the Year 2018.
The Jerk of the Year is a bulging field of jerks from politics, sports, entertainment and other newsworthy individuals who have shone in jerkdom in 2018. It really has been a Year of the Jerk in 2018, and one listen to the podcast will remind of just how big a year it has been for the jerks of the world.
Hero of the Year 2018 is a collection of people who are much less well known to most of the public, but are certainly deserving of some more limelight. Ranging from B Grade to the real obscure, it is our way of showing that 2018 still had a glass that was half full. Hard to do in a year full of Jerk.
Voting for both Hero of the Year and Jerk of the Year will be open until December 31, but if you haven’t made an informed choice yet, tune in our podcast below.
Have a listen, then follow the links to vote for your favourite.
And as always, Vote Early and Vote Often.
HERO & JERK OF THE YEAR 2018 PODCAST
Here is our one off podcast with a form guide to help you make your vote count.
2018 JERK OF THE YEAR VOTING
Here is the current 2018 Jerk of the Year leaderboard.
[socialpoll id=”2530171″]
2018 HERO OF THE YEAR VOTING
And time to check in on the 2018 Hero of the Month poll too.
The inevitable has happened and Jose Mourinho has been fired from Manchester United, and of course there will be speculation about what comes next from everyone, so we also offer up our suggestions for Future Jose Mourinho Career Prospects and the next Manchester United manager.
We have a real left field option for Manchester United’s next manager, not currently listed in any market.
And for the future Jose Mourinho career prospects, we have some serious and silly options.
WHO COMES NEXT FOR MANCHESTER UNITED?
The excellent Sack Race website is the place to go for the odds and story behind each sacking, and the biggest in English football is no different.
Despite being currently contracted to the German national team, that relationship looks like it could end anytime after their bad run in 2018. So if you are going to leave the machine that is the German National Football team, why not go to one of the biggest clubs in Europe.
It is a big name they would crave, and he is a winner. Usually.
Only downside is a potential payoff to German football, expensive after paying out Mourinho too.
WHO THEY WILL PROBABLY TAKE
ZINEDINE ZIDANE
Available, and a magician after taking a busted arse Real Madrid side at the time to three consecutive Champions League titles.
Has the big name, and can handle the big names too. Something Mourinho has struggled with.
But does the French Footballing legend want to potential rub off some of his Real Madrid glow with this season’s Manchester United form.
THE LEFT FIELD
LEONARDO JARDIM
The former Monaco manager actually led Monaco to a French league title over big spending PSG. He left Monaco after they sold a few too many players in the off-season, but Thierry Henry’s arrival has proven that it is more than a manager problem.
Out of work and could be a decent cheap option for the rest of the season. When they go after Mauricio Pochettino in the summer.
FUTURE JOSE MOURINHO CAREER PROSPECTS
Time now for looking into the future Jose Mourinho career prospects.
SERIOUSLY….
NOT IN ENGLAND
Given the health of the other top six clubs in Europe, and the poisoned chalice that Jose Mourinho eventually has brought in his three stints in the Premier League, surely no club will come knocking again.
Unless there is a big big international takeover at a team lower than Manchester United are.
SERIE A
Jose Mourinho has managed with success in Italy in the past, winning the League and Champions League with Inter in 2010.
Good timing too, as four of the bigger clubs could all have space for him this season if they can afford him.
His former club Inter were going OK in the league, and still sit third, but they have only won two of their past five league games, and were just bumped out of the Champions League Knockout stages.
Given his European success with Inter, and Europa League with Manchester United, he could be a golden ticket to ensure Champions League next season.
Perhaps Rome could be the end destination, as both Lazio and Roma are not flying, and the race for the top four is tight. Roma are still in the Champions League and drew Porto in the next round, which would be coincidental.
Even AC Milan could use his magic, though unlikely after his Inter stint.
CHINESE SUPER LEAGUE
The home of slightly past their best, very overpriced footballing talent.
Perfect for him really.
PUNDIT
He could make a good pundit, but who could afford him.
NOT QUITE AS SERIOUS….
THE NEW STATLER FOR WALDORF
If the Muppet Show was ever going to reboot (and no doubt that will happen given the lack of ideas in the entertainment industry) then why not white-ant Statler and take over his position in the Muppet box.
If you look close enough, Statler actually looks a bit like Jose Mourinho, and is certainly grumpy enough to take on the responsibilities.
ROUND THE WORLD SOLO SAILING
He looks like a person who probably would be happy to sail around the world, but you couldn’t wish it upon anyone to spend that amount of time with him.
Looks like a rusty Sea Captain when unshaved, and you could imagine him in full length beard sailing back into the UK months later.
CRANKY NEIGHBOUR TELLING KIDS TO KEEP OFF THE GRASS
Given some of his behaviour could be interpreted as bullying, what better place to do it than your own home,
REFEREE
Maybe if no club takes him or a while he could get a referees badge, to improve his future Jose Mourinho career prospects. It may give him some empathy for the match officials. Or not.
MAN SITTING ABOVE WATER TANK IN DUNKING MACHINE
He could make a lot of money if he toured around the country daring people to throw a ball to knock him off his seat and into a giant vat of water.
A nice little earner if he can organise it. There would be plenty of takers. Charge $5 a throw.
