Faster than an Alpine, with more team rules than any type of fruit, with more hope of getting out of Q1 than certain drivers, and speaking only just a little more sense than Danica Patrick, it’s the F1 Donkey with his unique view on F1 and more. Before each race The F1 Donkey has put the ass in sass and unloads his alternative, slightly unhinged thoughts on F1, and he’s back to do it again in 2026 starting with the F1 Donkey’s 2026 F1 Season Predictions and Opinion.
First of all he’ll offer up his opinion on each team ahead of the new season, then offer up more gripes and opinion about the rest of what the 2026 season could offer. As only he can. Team by Team getting a spray.
F1 Donkey’s 2026 F1 Season Thoughts
Ahh, it’s that time of the year, F1 Testing is over but the first race is still over a while away, and the time in between will be filled with people coming up to my barn, or in the local park where there never fails to be an abandoned shopping trolley, or in the streets as I make my way to the local pub to discuss Formula 1, mainly on the back of Netflix dropping their latest season. Which by the way has too much Zak Brown and Christian Horner.
I shouldn’t complain about having more people who want to talk Colapinto, Albon, and Bortoleto, it is a good thing. Especially given the company in the barn is dull at best. Try living next to a goat that jsut destroys shit all day. But then again, no one really wants to talk about Colapinto do they, not even the goats, unless it’s the business manager of the driver who wants to white-ant him during 2026. Or maybe Jack Doohan, preceded by a “F**k”. But with Flavio in charge, managers might not need to help get Colapinto fired.
But where were/are these newly converted Netflix F1 fans when I wanted to talk Theirry Boutsen in the off season. Or the rivalry between Eddie Cheever and Riccardo Patrese at Alfa Romeo in the 1980’s, or the lack of fortune of the Zakspeed F1 team who made their own turbo engines and introduced Yamaha power into F1. At least Netflix has the excuse of all those 1980’s events happening before the internet was created.
Talking of Eddie Cheever and all things 1980’s – here one of the website’s better pieces, 1980’s F1 Explained – Cheever’d….for those who want to kill a little pre Australian GP time.
Some would just say that I am a bitter and old jerk of a donkey that should forget about the past and be thankful I have any friends. Although they are right, it still hurts. And I don’t have any friends.
But moving onto 2026 I’m not sure I’ve looked forward to a season less in quite a while. Well since the era where it was a matter of how many races Lewis Hamilton would win and how he would dress like someone giving a kid the keys to an adult dress up box.
I should be intrigued by the new cars, with new engines and all the new toys and battery saving devices and wing vents etc. But when I hear that drivers might have to lift off on a straight so they can try and overtake it hurts my brain. Not that it is particularly hard to hurt my brain because it is so small. But why would the leading motor sport category in the world want their cars to go slower on a straight, just so they can overtake later. Sounds stupid, or maybe I am because I don’t understand it.
The only reason a driver should drive slow on purpose is a good old fashioned brake test in man act of pure rage in a practice session that doesn’t matter. Like old times.
Maybe I’m just a simple F1 loving donkey, who loves his Keke Rosberg types who on occasion finish a cigarette, then jump in a car and set an F1 all time speed record in qualifying within a few minutes. Or Gilles Villeneuve who not only had to be the fastest driver in history, but the fastest driver in history of every corner of every race of every season. There’s no way he would ever lift in a straight to save battery power.
With so much stuff going on other than driving, why not go the next step and add bananas and mushrooms and those turtle shell things and have Formula One become a giant MarioKart World Championship. You could even have that ghost mode where the car disappears. Much like Lance Stroll most weekends when Q2 arrives.
The only benefit from all the technology appears to be that making a good start, or a start at all in F1 this season will be really difficult. So we may see a real variable that will shake up the grid, by having more cars stuck to it. Although, fair to point out that we don’t want crashes like Riccardo Paletti’s in the 1982 Canadian Grand Prix. The death of a driver is very bad, but some start line chaos is good. Very good.
Maybe I shouldn’t sit here and moan from my barn about Formula 1 with all the political trouble around the world, particularly in the middle east. With Iran potentially causing a few cancellations if the respective bombing and missile-ing doesn’t stop. Although I won’t miss the Bahrain Grand Prix, and the Saudi Arabian Grand Prix I could give or take too. Even better if even the threat of a missile getting as far as Miami could see the Miami Grand Prix cancelled too, that would be great.
Because you just know that F1 will probably follow FIFA, Noel Peace Prize winners and other bodies of lesser importance and award the US President some token award in his home state. If it is presented by Mr Straight Face Oscar Piastri for a few laughs then I’m in.
But I bet the F1 bosses are happy the season starts in Melbourne and not Bahrain like it has. So for those who moan about the early start for the Australian GP in Europe should quit their griping. Much like I should and get on with my team by team thoughts for the season ahead and start preparing some Australian Grand Peix opinion that I’m sure my new Netflix friends can’t wait for.
F1 Donkey’s 2026 F1 Season Predictions and Opinion
And if the above wasn’t enough, here’s the F1 Donkey’s Team by Team view on the season ahead.
TEAMS
MCLAREN
There’s no reason they can’t win both titles again, but there’s lots of reasons I don’t want them to. Papaya Rules, Zac Brown, Lando Norris’ dad who looks like an evil character from a Harry Potter movie, Sky F1 bias, the colour Orange, their social media offering, attempts to make Oscar Piastri super interesting and attempts to make Lando Norris a style guru. But it will be interesting to see the dynamics between the drivers now that one of them has won a championship.
MERCEDES
A new era and it looks like Mercedes have nailed it this time. Well that’s people are saying, that there’s a special trick with something in the engine that I’m too stupid to understand. Sounds like it is a better idea than the zero sidepod solution last rule change that ruined them for a few seasons. Well, that and Lewis Hamilton’s form falling off a cliff before he took that special recipe to Ferrari. One does wonder how much sandbagging was going on in Testing ahead of this season. Plenty I suspect. The fun thing will be to see if the teenager can land a Championship ahead of the George Russell who has patiently waited for a decade.
RED BULL
The change to their own/Ford engine doesn’t look like it has slowed Red Bull down, but the new technology of the car has slowed Max Verstappen’s enthusiasm for F1 a bit. Maybe he’ll retire after one season of the new rules and go and enter every major motorsport event in 2027, and he’ll probably win them all. As for the worst, career killing seat in F1 – being Max Verstappen’s team mate at Red Bull – the team look in the best shape for a while with Isack Hadjar taking on the job. Be a shame if it doesn’t work, as HAdjar look the most promising in a while.
FERRARI
Ferrari showed glimpses of speed and competence in Testing, and whilst I hope it continues into the season proper, it’s hard to trust Ferrari to do so. We need the red cars involved in a genuine Championship battle. If it is another underwhelming season, one wonder if either driver will be around in 2027. Lewis Hamilton “retiring” and Charles Leclerc looking for a better drive, or a bigger cut of the Drive to Survive profits.
WILLIAMS
Despite two decent drivers, a storied history, being liked by nearly all F1 fans, the occasional podium looks like the ceiling. More Carlos Sainz is more, so we’ll take it.
ASTON MARTIN
Not for the first time, Alonso has a car that feels like a wheelbarrow because of a new Honda engine and how pleased he will be throughout 2026 and nearly a decade after the last experience. Not even Adrian Newey looks like he can save the season. The only upside is that if the 2026 car is no world beater, at least Lance Stroll won’t be World Champion. And reports are his dad, and career saviour is getting bored of the trouble that Aston Martin is in. So maybe no more Stroll after this season.
AUDI
At least Audi will have an excuse if they are a little slow this season having a brand new engine from a company who have never made an F1 engine before. But they have The Hulk, and if he can get busted-arse Saubers onto the podium who knows. Bortoleto seems quite competent too. All in all, they are a non-offensive, nice team to follow.
HAAS
Could be a team on the rise, with improvements shown in testing, a great new paint job, another year experience under the belt of Oliver Bearman, and Captain Surly aka Esteban Ocon’s overall experience. I wonder if it is the arrival of a new USA team that has lit the fire. Would be nice if Haas v Cadillac turns into a big rivalry to match the old Horner v Wolff. But then again, Haas will probably sell out to Toyota.
RACING BULLS
It really doesn’t matter.
CADILLAC
So good to have the excitement of a new team in F1, it has been far too long. F1 has become too commercial compared to the glory days of the 1980’s where all you needed was an upturned bathtub, add wheels, and Judd engine, some cigarette money and you had a team. These days you need a Top 100 company backing, beg for five years, build your engine, and hire Sergio Perez to get a team into F1. They did a good in Testing not to be in a different time zone over a lap. Aston Martin will be very wary of them early. Balancing out the corporate colours and Sergio Perez’s blandness with a dual paintjob and new social media star Valtteri Bottas.
ALPINE
Huh, I genuinely couldn’t remember the 11th team for an hour while planning this season preview. It ended up being Alpine that I forgot. Figures, they are forgettable. So bad they dumped their own engine and kept Franco Colapinto for some reason. At least with Flavio still in charge, he’ll be lucky to see the summer break as an F1 driver.
