Angrier than a room full of Fox League writers, more at fault for rugby league’s ills than Lachlan Galvin and Phil Gould combined, putting up less of a fight than a NSW origin team, and ducking for cover like a Melbourne Storm Assistant Coach, it’s time for the weekly Rugby League rant of The Gurgler’s NRL Donkey, who provides his NRL Donkey’s 2025 NRL Round 20 Expert Tips as well as offers an alternative, slightly unhinged view full of sass of the world of rugby league and beyond for another week.
The NRL Donkey’s 2025 NRL Round 20 Weekly Rant
Bloody hell, another week, and Lachlan Galvin is the main talking point of the NRL. This time for not playing. Which is kind of where this all started when he was not playing for the Wests Tigers. Or didn’t want to. Can’t remember. If I wanted to remember I could tune into NRL360, but then I’d probably have to shoot myself, and since I like living and am not that interested I won’t. Watch 360 and shoot myself that is.
One can’t quite blame Lachlan Galvin for wanting to leave a side that doesn’t win, but did you know that the Tigers win % when Galvin played in 2025 was 50%. And in the four games Galvin has played for the Bulldogs since they have won half. That’s pretty close to equal. So Galvin appears to provide that safe 50% win rate, which we all know is usually good enough for finals. So all good there I suppose.
But dragging him all the way to Townsville not to play doesn’t seem like a great idea, but Gus has told us it’s all in the plan. He also not us Galvin was the best young player in the game and he never met him before signing. That’s probably all true. There’s always more to the story than we know, and most care about, except only the grumpiest, most cynical and hate0filled people on earth. Like Buzz Rothfield.
We don’t know that Lachlan Galvin isn’t a mad V8 Supercars fan and has loved the work David Reynolds for a decade. David Reynolds being the likeable larrikin of V8 Supercars. He’s the complete opposite of F1’s Lance Stroll, except neither will win an F1 race. The V8’s were in Townsville last weekend, so a convenience.
We don’t know that Lachlan Galvin isn’t secretly in love with the city of Townsville. Although that does seem unlikely. As I have never met anyone who speaks fondly of Townsville. Like State of Origin on Channel Nein, most will tolerate it because they can for as long they can and get out as quickly as possible. And some will avoid it all together.
Perhaps there’s a stroke of genius that we don’t know about. Of course that doesn’t mean we don’t not know rugby league like fans who their team at half time, just the Bulldogs’ recruitment is a secret piece of genius.
Get outspoken football manager with high profile to talk up potential player, unsettle potential player at current club, hire them and not play them just so their rivals can’t play the player themselves. So essentially it becomes more about taking players so other teams can’t have them.
I’m sure it will all work out and Lachlan Galvin will lead the Bulldogs to NRL glory and then NSW to Origin glory, and Fox League to Galvin Podcast glory.
Which brings me to the most recent State of Origin. Due to prior speaking commitments at the Rooty Hill RSL Toastmasters club, I had to make do with watching the Fox League delayed coverage which starts after the game has finished. And what an experience that is.
As long as you can avoid your phone during the game, which for a donkey is easy as there’s no keypad big enough for a hoof, then it doesn’t matter if you watch it two hours late. Unless you live next to a house of bogans who were so hyped from a Maroons win and smashed on True but Fair Bundaberg Rum who let off a Fourth of July amount of fireworks. Which is a danger as I noticed their garden hose continues to get shorter and shorter. Thankfully I avoided that this time, noting, I would likely have joined in the Rum gang if I was there.
But Fox Sports provides a coverage of State of Origin that is so fresh and so clean, clean. No ads, no waiting two minutes for The Bunker to make a decision, no waiting thirty seconds for some to take a shot at goal, and thankfully no Channel Nein.
No Gus Gould. No Andrew Johns mumbling his way into full sulk mode when NSW start losing. No Cameron Smith doing anything. The live cross to Billy Slater was seen and not heard, which suits me fine. And no Mat Thompson spending the minutes in between Cameron Smith’s smugness and Andrew Johns droll/dross yelling at the game, to the point of getting a headache bigger than hanging out with the Rum gang next door.
Moving away from the Bulldogs, and super coaches, a question…..Given the Rabbitohs current bad run of form in 2025, is Wayne Bennett suffering from the post Wayne Bennett curse. Or does Kristan Woolf’s relative success in breaking the Wayne Bennett curse then mean the curse goes back to Wayne Bennett himself, so Wayne Bennett is now doomed for all eternity of NRL coaching because of his own curse. Given Bennett has expressed an interest in coaching the PNG team, he won’t want to bring that with him to Port Moresby. Although given the locals love for rugby league that could break the Wayne Bennett curse forever.
Talking of cursing, most fans here at this page will probably be doing just that if they follow all of my NRL Round 20 Expert tips.
The NRL Donkey’s 2025 NRL Round 20 Expert Tips
Thu – DOLPHINS v NORTH QUEENSLAND (Suncorp)
Amazing that teams separated by over 1,300km have a stat where the away team always wins. But there you go. Both teams had gallant losses last weekend, but only one team’s coach is heading for the exit. Dolphins decided that missing an entire forward pack and regular five eighth wasn’t enough, so rested their star fullback. Ray Stone can only do so much. Dolphins fans, and I’m one of many, are hoping it’s one of those losses we had to have before going on a finals burst. Hopefully not like previous seasons where the air is quickly coming out of the balloon.
Dolphins by 22
Fri – CRONULLA v ROOSTERS
Cronulla have a much better record than most people realise on a Friday. Maybe they do and just don’t care. This game is in the Friday 6pm timeslot, so the perfect game not to care about.
Cronulla by 8
Fri – PENRITH v SOUTHS (CommBank)
It was interesting for a while when Penrith let other teams win. Souths are right in form to do the Panthers that very favour this weekend.
Penrith by 20
Sat – CANBERRA v PARRAMATTA
Wonder if Parramatta can outscore the maximum temperature in Canberra. Probably not.
Canberra by 16
Sat – BULLDOGS v ST GEORGE ILLAWARRA (Accor)
The Flanagans will be thankful that it’s the Bulldogs this weekend so the question over sons and fathers will be less important than Lachlan Galvin.
Bulldogs by 12
Sat – MELBOURNE v MANLY
Melbourne’s record at home on a Saturday and against Sydney teams is patchy. The same kind of patchy that makes the watching the Storm games so good when they pan to the Storm coaching box. On that basis alone I’m hoping for an upset. And a catastrophic explosion of rage in the coaching box.
Manly by 2
Sun – WESTS TIGERS v GOLD COAST (Leichhardt)
Both of these teams suck. But at least one is heading in the right-ish direction. Maybe.
Wests Tigers by 4
Sun – NEWCASTLE v WAHS
<Checks notes> Excuse me Channel Nein, it’s a Sunday, and you have the Warriors on a TV game. May I refer you to this website. Regards. NRL Donkey.
Warriors by 6
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Your prediction is always right tips