A local cricketer is looking forward to a fresh start after leaving a problematic club.
John moved to Melbourne in 2023 for work and – and having played 15 years of Queensland Sub-District Cricket for a handful of clubs – was eager to join his new local club (which he refuses to name now).
“I was pretty excited, went to pre-season training, and was picked for sixth grade straight away,” John said.
But his excitement quickly turned sour.
“The vibe there was gross. There were so many personality clashes and in-fighting among the players, including at least two fistfights between teammates,” John said. “The captain was an absolute feral and was always arguing with his wife, who was the unofficial team manager. It’s no surprise that they split up and she moved to Adelaide and has a bunch of kids with a new bloke.”
But the off-field behaviour was worse.
“We had this Facebook chat group and little fights would bust out every week. After the latest fight – usually over stupid stuff – I thought ‘Are we going to have a team next week?’ It was that bad!”
And the team disharmony affected John’s form too.
“I started out bowling fast off-breaks and loved it. But towards the end of the first season, our wicketkeeper told me to flight it up more. I followed his advice but I went too far the other way and by the end of the second season was bowling slow moon balls with nothing on them. Anything slightly short would sit up and get smashed! And, because I wasn’t comfortable with how I was bowling, I started getting stage fright when bowling to sloggers.”
After they finished last in the 2023/24 season, John came back for another shot, but it wasn’t much better.
“A few of the bad seeds had left, so team harmony was a little better, but we still missed the finals by a lot.”
The final straw came in the last game of the second season.
“I was fielding at point and their tailender hit a high ball straight to me. I was settling under for an easy catch when I was slammed to the ground. One of my idiot teammates ran into me so he could take the catch and carry on like a galah! And the others were so busy celebrating the win that they didn’t bother checking on me. But I was ok, just winded.” John said. “I was already feeling lousy about my bowling, so I went straight home and started looking for a new place to play.”
Inspiration struck when John was browsing a community page on Facebook: a new indoor centre was opening and they had indoor cricket.
“I texted the centre manager and he said I could start on Wednesday night. Just a fill-in at first, but he’d try and find a team for me eventually.”
John messaged his outdoor club’s chat group, announced he was leaving the club and left the chat group.
“It was a massive relief. Then I started unfriending every one of my ex-teammates on Facebook. Except for one guy who was nice to me and arranged to pick up my club gear.”
John is preparing for his new start in indoor by watching YouTube highlights of indoor tournaments and going to the local nets to work in his fast spinners again.
“I went back to my old run up, my old pace and accuracy returned immediately, and the stage fright went away. I can’t wait until Wednesday!”
The Gurgler presents stories of the Park Cricketer, where we explore the lower reaches of the great game of cricket from the suburban ovals and rural grounds across Australia.
