The August 2021 Jerk of the Month nominations are here, and what another bunch of depressing nominations it is. More of the same from the usual suspects, and more of the same from new people. The common theme is more of the same. And same is depressing.
Oh, how we long for a simpler time when the Jerk of the Month was dominated by the Tomics and Kyrgios’ of this world.
At least Donald Trump made Australians feel slightly better knowing the biggest jerk plays of the month we’re usually stateside.
Again most of the nominations have something to do with Covid, whose pandemic is not only spreading as a virus, but spreading the worst behaviour in people.
Determining the month’s biggest jerk is ultimately up to you, the reader of this website.
Read the form guide, and vote now, and vote early and vote often. For as many of the candidates whose cut of jib you dislike.
VOTE NOW – August 2021 Jerk of the Month
Time to put your official vote in for Jerk of the Month for August 2021.
Feel free to vote for as many of these jerks as you like. They have asked for it, nay demanded it.
And vote multiple times on multiple devices. It looks good for our website numbers too.
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ANTI-EVERYTHING PROTESTERS 26%, 13 votes13 votes 26%13 votes - 26% of all votes
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MELBOURNE ENGAGEMENT PARTY 22%, 11 votes11 votes 22%11 votes - 22% of all votes
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COVID RULE BREAKERS 12%, 6 votes6 votes 12%6 votes - 12% of all votes
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KABUL SKY DIVING T SHIRT SELLERS 10%, 5 votes5 votes 10%5 votes - 10% of all votes
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SCOMO 8%, 4 votes4 votes 8%4 votes - 8% of all votes
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DELTA STRAIN - CORONAVIRUS 6%, 3 votes3 votes 6%3 votes - 6% of all votes
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OLYMPICS HORSE PUNCHER 6%, 3 votes3 votes 6%3 votes - 6% of all votes
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CHANNEL SEVEN OLYMPIC COVERAGE 4%, 2 votes2 votes 4%2 votes - 4% of all votes
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Gladys Berejiklian 2%, 1 vote1 vote 2%1 vote - 2% of all votes
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JOSH DUGAN 2%, 1 vote1 vote 2%1 vote - 2% of all votes
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MAGPIES 2%, 1 vote1 vote 2%1 vote - 2% of all votes
2021 RESULTS – Monthly Jerk of the Month Winners
July
HORSE PUNCHING PROTESTORS
June
BRISBANE 19YO LOCKDOWN COVID SPREADER
COVID RESTRICTION IGNOREES
CARDBOARD WAIVING TOUR DE FRANCE FAN
May –
MICHAEL SLATER
JARRYD HAYNE & FRIENDS
April –
SCOMO
HARRY & MEGHAN
INSTRAGRAM INFLUENCERS
March –
SCOMO
MAFS
February –
ANTI-VAXXERS
January –
DONALD TRUMP
MOANING TENNIS PLAYERS IN QUARANTINE
FORM GUIDE – August 2021 Jerk of the Month
DELTA STRAIN – CORONAVIRUS
pestis acerba
As if regular Coronavirus wasn’t bad enough……
Not much good comes from the word delta. Delta strain of Coronavirus which seems hellbent on wrecking everyone’s fun, the latin Delta symbol is by far the least interesting character, and worst of all Delta Goodrem.
The Delta strain of Coronavirus is the ultimate party pooper, unleashing another wave of misery around the world who have mostly defeated the initial waves.
Delta punishes the stupid and lazy, which is a worry given how many there are in either or both categories.
And means Covid is likely to push into 2022 rather than disappear before 2021 ends.
SCOMO
venalicium stultus
Let’s be honest, the Australian Covid shamble is mostly Scomo’s fault.
The only decent thing he has done since the beginning of 2020 (his bushfire “support”) was JobKeeper, and even that is now turning out to be a way of shoveling money to the richest people in Australia.
Mr “It’s Not A Race” is now basing everything on a race to vaccinate Australians. Meanwhile he passes judgement on state behaviour, which is odd given he dusted his hands of responsibility back to the states originally.
With News Ltd and Anti-Everything protesters doing all the hard work for him, alongside an anonymous opposition, the smuggest of all smuggers will probably get another few years as boss.
So as he unveils his fifth or eighth roadmap to get Australia out of the sh!t, which involves everyone else doing the work, why not unveil a Jerk of the Month vote for him.
ANTI-EVERYTHING PROTESTERS
caeli capitibus
What a wonderful sight to see anti-lockdown, anti-vax, anti-media (well they do have a point on that one) and anti-just-about-everything-else marching in tight, maskless groups hitting cops and spreading crap.
Helium heads the lot of them, and now it is the younger generations turn to look at some of the older participants and be not angry but very disappointed.
As bad as the marches are in the first place given the current rate of infection in some of the cities, the placards and slogan are even worse.
Be it poor grammar, terrible rhyming or just an outright Facebook lie, they are pitiful.
Perhaps the punishment is swapping a planeload of the people who are worst “affected” by lockdown to Kabul for a real taste of everyday misery and lack of freedom.
COVID RULE BREAKERS
non cerebrum
The reason Covid has been able to spread in Australia is mainly through arrogant people doing arrogant, selfish things.
It’s quick and easy to comply, and quick and easy to get out of lockdowns if you do.
Of course compliance runs the risk of being called a Sheep by the Facebook Warriors, but the alternative is being locked in a pen like Sheep.
Most of the below deserve their own slot for ignorance, but the lsit would ever end, so we picked the “best” of the “worst”.
Like these buffons in Big W.
Doctors at an illegal Melbourne party.
Leading Melbourne Jockeys at an illegal party.
Family who travelled to Melbourne and back and refused to get testing from Qld
And really anyone else who took that extra liberty or like twits who couldn’t be arsed wearing masks when everyone else is because of rules.
Especially at schools where special parents refuse to wear masks while 95% of everyone comply. And of course these air heads hang out around gates or create a 30cm wide corridor to get past. And then they’ll wonder why their kids don’t listen to rules. Although they’ll probably lay find an excuse for that too.
MELBOURNE ENGAGEMENT PARTY
pars pagani
Covid Rule Breakers have their own category, but some deserve their own nomination.
Cue the predictable Covid spread from the party.
Cue the hatred of people doing the right thing.
Cue the Jerk of the Month nomination.
Gladys Berejiklian and all Premiers really
Meh
Whilst Covid is not the NSW Premier’s fault, a lot of Sydney’s outbreak could be argued is.
She’s growing more oblivious to her poor decision making, and failing to take any blame at all
Everything is everyone else’s fault.
She even doesn’t show up on certain days when records are broken.
And there’s the rest of the country’s Premier who all have their occasional periods of jerk.
Some prefer sports people, some are even more hated by News Ltd than others, and some further West simply don’t care what anyone else thinks.
All probably all have the best interests of their state at heart, well except Gladys, but we’ve reached saturation point of them all.
OLYMPICS HORSE PUNCHER
sapere equum
In what seems a disturbing trend, we have a horse puncher in the Jerk of the Month nominations.
No, Horse Puncher is not an obscure sexual position, it is literally a person punching a horse.
This month’s nomination managed to do so at one of the world’s biggest events – The Olympics.
We say if people want to punch horses let’s get them into the ring with the right protective equipment and let horse v man battle it out but at least make it fair. For horses can bite, kick and squeal.
CHANNEL SEVEN OLYMPIC COVERAGE
circo spectaculum
It’s so easy to pick on Free to Air coverage of a major sporting event.
So we will.
So much swimming. Yes we won loads of gold and stuff, but so much swimming.
They even cut from live events to show replays of interviews about swimming.
Of course all of this doesn’t apply to the mega thrusting swim coach who provided the all time greatest Olympic moment for us.
Next up, we get it, Ariarne Titmus is the daughter of a Seven News reporter. Nothing against the heroic swimmer, just Channel Seven flogging the horse over it. Although, as above, horse punishment was a theme of Tokyo’s games.
Then Channel Seven’s coverage in general and the many ads for crap after the Olympics.
Like the Australian Open before it, nothing good comes after the Tennis or Olympics. Ever.
JOSH DUGAN
stigmata stulti
Havng already been banned and fined this season for breaking NRL Covid protocols you’d think Josh Dugan would behave himself.
Until you realise it is Josh Dugan
Looks like he has a glass brain to go with his glass body.
Caught twice in one night lying about his whereabouts to avoid the Sydney lockdown.
If only he was as evasive with the football for the Sharks.
KABUL SKY DIVING T SHIRT SELLERS
ad inferos
We’re fans of dark-ish humour and a little bit of fun, but the company that hastily (within a day) of coming up with the Kabul Sky Diving Club T-Shirts with images of the unfortunate Afghan people falling from the airborne plane is of real jerk quality.
MAGPIES
volantem malus
It’s that time of year when these birds turn into swooping jerks.
Terrorising innocent people just trying to enjoy the great outdoors.
They may be a protective specie but aren’t protected from a J.O.M. Nom.
