April sure has flown by, and before you know it, the Jerk of the Month April 2017 Nominations are here.
For the third time in 2017 we assemble the month’s biggest Jerks, and call on you the loyal Gurgler reader to vote on who was the biggest Jerk.
The winner of Jerk of the Month April 2017 will join an elite list from our previous two monthly polls. And all will be no doubt hoping to be featuring in the end of year poll.
February 2017 – Donald Trump
March 2017 – Pete Evans
2016 Jerk of the Year – Channel Nein Cricket Commentary
This month saw nominations come from our loyal readers, and the other are determined by our writing staff or simply demand selection themselves with their jerkdom. If you want to nominate a Jerk feel free to get in touch via our email contact@thegurgler.com.
Onto the nominations for Jerk of the Month April 2017, and as ever it is a bulging list of undesirables, but who is the biggest jerk? It’s over to you now to vote. Vote early, vote often.
Wests Tigers Big 4
Nominated by loyal reader Frankington Stanley, but seconded by us. We delivered a rant published on Fox Sports (The NRL Player Transfer Market Stinks) and these four were at the heart of the issue. Daily speculation of where they were going has become so annoying, and it is great it has been sorted. But their behaviour, including one players who has the Balmain postcode til I die tattoo, has been pretty ordinary and Wests Tigers fans have a real reason to call all four jerks. Even though Brooks has re-signed.
Mitchell Moses
Called out for special attention by Frankington Stanley and deservedly so. The weakest of the “Big 4” and he has had his eye on elsewhere for a while. The signing with Parra and wanting to bail immediately is Jerk work of the highest order. The fact that the Tigers have moved on a few quality five-eighths going well elsewhere to keep him adds a multiplier.
Peter Dutton
Nominated by another reader from within the electorate of Dickson (you can nominate a Jerk of the Month anytime at contact@thegurgler.com). Dutton really puts the first four letters of that area into the name of the federal seat. With a smug look on a face that most want to throw something at, he doesn’t need much of an excuse to be nominated. More accurately is why he has escaped our Jerk poll for so long.
Sean Spicer
There’s not much good about Donald Trump being US President, aside from his excesses is the group of people he has surrounded himself with. One of that group is nominated as a potential Jerk of the Month April 2017. Whilst anything Trump related could be jerk-worthy, the spokesman’s comments regarding Hitler and Assad assured him of a nomination amongst the world’s biggest jerks for April.
Bernard Tomic
Flying the flag for Tennis Jerks this month after Nick Kyrgios decided to use his powers for good and take Australia into the Semi Finals without being a jerk about it. Tomic is concentrating on his sliding singles form, and has done well with five straight first round exits. He said recently he was not really interested in making himself available for Australia in Davis Cup, thankfully Australia is not very interested in him.
The TAB for the awful Bon Jovi Ads
Ads are a necessary evil, without them you wouldn’t have the quality viewing on offer on TV, and most ads are awful. But to be singled out for a Jerk nomination you have to be truly awful, and the TAB ads featuring Bon Jovi are. Whichever white shoed committee came up with the idea thinking it was good to have grown men mouthing words to an awful turd-rock staple to sports stars should punch themselves in the face and lip synch their way to hospital.
Snapchat CEO
Apparently the CEO of Snapchat is Evan Spiegel and he says that his app is only for rich people. Good.
Tony Abbott
There’s nothing sadder than a former PM still thinking he should be one. Case in point with Kevin Rudd. You only need to look back on his “highlight reel” to remember how embarrassing he was. Only positive is if he is reinstated as Liberal leader, like Rudd before him it will probably extend the opposition’s margin.
Uber drivers
The cyclists of the roads. Whenever you see a car driving like a Jerk without care or consideration for anyone else on the planet, it will usually have an Uber logo on the car. Nothing is more important than the current or next fare, not safety nor consideration. Maybe they have a new found arrogance for being the new big thing, or expanding self importance for taking on the Taxi industry and winning, or maybe they were just Jerks to begin with. Whatever they are nominated for Jerks of the Month April 2017.
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