With a disappearance from a major as predictable as the pout-fest that would be the losing press conference the Nick Kyrgios Australian Open Exit from earlier in the week surprised few.
Since a large chunk of the pre tournament hype was around the young tyro, the Nick Kyrgios Australian Open Exit will have disappointed marketers of the new fancy AO logo, Channel 7 and the handful of genuine non-Bandwagon Nick Kyrgios fans across the globe.
Nick Kyrgios is hard to like, and our readers thought so too, as he was named runner up in our 2016 Jerk of the Year poll. The fact that he only just lost to the Channel Nein Commentary team shows a real keen eye on Jerkdom.
We obtained exclusive insider information from both Pals and Onlookers of Nick Kyrgios after the Jerk of the Year 2016 was announced, and they all stated exclusively to The Gurgler that the controversial firebrand and genuine Tennis Jerk would do whatever it takes to win the 2017 edition of the award. Just over half a month in and he’s right on top following the Nick Kyrgios Australian Open Exit.
It’s not the loss that makes people hate him, it is the manner of the loss that annoys most. Australians love a fighter, someone who puts in a shift, hell we begrudgingly supported Tennis Jerk Pioneer Lleyton Hewitt because he was so determined to try. Kyrgios has more ability than most, but chooses to throw it with his self entitlement and pisspoor attitude.
With an opponent as tough to beat as the Channel Nein Commentary team, Kyrgios and his entourage will be very wary to build on the Nick Kyrgios Australian Open Exit with more meltdowns at lesser tournaments to ensure he stays in the public’s eye throughout 2017.
The same Insiders and Pals from above also exclusively told The Gurgler that Nick Kyrgios has been watching press conferences of Lewis Hamilton from 2016, and hours of Donald Trump supporters on Fox News US to make sure that his off court antics remain to the same level of Jerk as his on court behaviour.
The only silver lining to the Nick Kyrgios Australian Open Exit is that he is able to go on the road earlier than expected with his range of products on sale from his exclusive line of Tennis Jerks Inc gifts. With something special for that someone special, there’s never been a better time to visit the Tennis Jerks.
So stay tuned during 2017 to see their progress. Or why not download our Tennis Jerk Bingo board and cross off the boxes as they happen. Surely Tomic’s next Tennis Jerk brainfade isn’t too far away.
