March 28, 2017

Ben Barba – Your Rugby League Care Package Is Ready

So Ben Barba is leaving for rugby, and says NRL have given him nothing. We had a whip around and now unveil the Ben Barba NRL Care Package.

ben barba nrl care package

So Ben Barba has decided to bugger off and play rugby union, and fears he may never play in the NRL again. Boo hoo.

We have no sympathy for anyone who decides rugby union is better than rugby league. Lest a player who has thrown talent away like Ben Barba has done.

Like former Gurgler Semi Radradra, players can go to rugby union and do as they please. Just don’t expect us to be waiting with open arms when you work out that union is a rubbish game or that anyone will miss you. Refer Bevan French at Parramatta.

But when we heard Ben Barba remark that the “The NRL haven’t given me too much” we felt a tinge of pity towards him. Imagine that a player on plenty of cash, getting to play a sport he loves and is incredibly good at not getting much from the NRL despite being a bit of a turd off the field.

It made us and the readers of The Gurgler sad. Maybe we have been too tough if he truly feels the NRL haven’t given him anything.

Our readers are a generous bunch. After we sent the call around yesterday on social media we were inundated of NRL stuff to assemble a goodbye NRL care package to prove the NRL has given him something, and have a bunch of things to remind him of what will be better days. Especially when he works out how eccentric the Toulon owner is, and how boring he will find rugby union.

So, Ben Barba, The Gurgler presents to you, your NRL Rugby Care Package. Don’t say the NRL gives you nothing now.

 

BEN BARBA NRL CARE PACKAGE CONTENTS

MARTIN BELLA POG

One of the great props of the 80’s with a great mo in Pog form. What a way to start the Ben Barba NRL Care Package.

TWO GREAT RUGBY LEAGUE PLAYING CARDS

One reader has generously parted with not one but two obscure former Rabbitohs players in card form. Both were goal kicking back, and it is hard to judge who better Bronco Djura and Eoin Crossan. No nned to choose Ben Barba, they’re both yours.

1:18 SCALE REPLICA OF THE AMCO CUP

Just as forgotten as you will be going to rugby union, not many born before 1990 will remember the AMCO Cup. The midweek feast was an idea for another time, as league players whine too much these days about the schedule. But Ben Barba will always have a reminder on how quickly you can be forgotten when he wears this replica on a chain around his neck.

A GOLD COAST DOLPHINS JERSEY

Do you recall that the Titans originally wanted to be the Dolphins? That was the intention until Redcliffe told them to get stuffed. And rightly so. It didn’t stop them creating a jersey nor Gurgler Reader Sandy Cheeks sending in a very rare Gold Coast Dolphins jersey for you NRL Care package.

ONE FREE HIRE OF THE REDCLIFFE DOLPHIN MASCOT SUIT

Whilst on the subject of Dolphins, Redcliffe have generously offered one free 6 hour hire of the iconic mascot outfit. Imagine the Mad Monday fun going as the Bayside club’s best outfit. Only for when he returns. Not before.

A FREE CAN OF GOLD WITH EVERY VISIT TO A CENTRAL CAPRAS GAME

Although Ben Barba is originally from the Mackay area, that doesn’t mean he will never be in Rockhampton. If he is ever in the Beef City, he is entitled to his first can of XXX Gold free every time he visits Browne Park for a Capras game. Who knows after he’s done in the south of France or sacked being Le Merde, Browne Park could be a place to ply his trade after his ban is completed.

LAURIE NICHOLLS LIKE SINGLET

One of our readers grew up as a Balmain fan, and fondly remembers Laurie Nicholls punching the air at Tigers games. So for his 8th birthday he was gifted a black singlet so he could be like the man. Since the singlet no longer fits, it is being added to the Ben Barba NRL Care Package as a memory of real rugby league fans.

DISCARDED ORANGE MOUTHGUARD FROM JOE KILROY circa 1988 ORIGIN SERIES

Somehow one of our readers has the discarded Orange mouthguard of Smokin’ Joe Kilroy from the legendary 1988 State of Origin, and now it is all Ben Barba’s. Enjoy.

A LOSING FIRST TRY SCORER BET ON SCOTT MINTO SIGNED BY DEREK RUCKER

Long story short, one of our readers foolishly placed a first try scorer bet on Scott Minto back in the day. Happily in the TAB in Paddington was Derek Rucker having a Sunday afternoon of leisure. So in anticipation of the Scott Minto bet not winning, he got the former Brisbane Bullet legend to autograph the ticket. Whilst the wager didn’t win, our reader most certainly did. And so will Ben Barba with this very limited edition piece of NRL memorabilia.

 

So, Ben Barba, if you are interested in receiving your NRL Care Package, please let us know the best address to send you this whilst you’re still in Australia. We’re not paying to send it to France.

About Kaaps Loche 175 Articles
Kaaps doesn’t sleep much, and has a 60inch full HD TV and Foxtel, therefore watches more television than most. is also very strange and has a slightly different outlook on life, so comes up with a lot of rubbish that he thinks is funny and usually isn’t. Out of sympathy, we publish his stuff from time to time. So prepare your sympathy laughs and put that lovely drawing on the fridge for Kaaps.

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