Circling the Drain 5 – Gurgler on Sport

By Max Layne.

Whoever said too much sport is barely enough, they speak wise. This past week the AFL and F1 Circus joined the long conga line of sporting events to catch up or stay up with. With the winter footy codes just getting started and overseas and local football getting into the pointy end and various other sports getting started as well, there’s far too much to stay up to date with everything.

We attempt to provide a little snapshot on the sporting world so you don’t have to trawl through various News Corp related websites that will cost eventually. So our articles are free, but then again you get what you pay for. That’s why we give our best tips so you not only not have to pay but can make money from our site. The highest of wishful thinking.

Might I mention for no good reason Francis Awaritefe.

The STABILO BOSS HIGHLIGHTS OF THE WEEK – brought to you by Franklins Big Fresh.


– Australian Grand Prix – Always a big event when the F1 season kicks off in Melbourne – new cars, new partnerships, new rules. The predicted unreliability was evident but nowhere near as widespread as feared in the lead up. Qualifying allowed an opportunity for Aussie GP fans to congratulate Sebastian Vettel on his fourth title last year with a rousing reception when he missed Q3. The race itself brought the usual we expect from the first race. Vettel doubled his joy with zero points, and newly not engaged Ham was served up the same outcome. We welcomed back Kamui Kobayashi who rewarded punter by converting our first retirement tip into a little Pat.

– Dan Ricciardo – he did what great Australian icon Mark Webber couldn’t do and get onto the podium in Oz. Was set up by the brilliant lap in qualifying on Saturday which was an unexpected treat. His disqualification was gladly well after the podium so at least I could be enjoyed for a while. Read our conspiracies article on they why of his DQ.

– ICC T20 World Cup minnows – did you know Hong Kong and Nepal had cricket teams? Well good on you for paying attention. The rest of us can marvel at the minnows getting their chance on the big stage.

– AFL newbies winning their first round clashes – in a big up yours to the Swans the GWS flew home to win their first derby impressively. Gold Coast also beat Top 4 hopefuls Richmond, showing how far the two franchises have come and what a good job the AFL have done. Also shows that expansion is not a dirty word if done properly. Are you listening NRL? Probably not. P.S. Collingwood being flogged is always a bonus for the neutral.

– PNG made it 3/3. They’ll be in Brisbane for games soon. Do yourself a favour.

– John Senden – a win on the US PGA Tour and a spot in the Masters, boosting Australian and Qld numbers for the green jacket event.



top shelf

EVAN GULBIS – Tasmanian Cricketer.

Sheffield Shield gets the ultimate nod this week after the performance of Gulbis. In their last game of a disappointment defending season, Tasmania were 6/238 when number 8 Gulbis walks to the crease. 229 runs from 293 balls later from the man and with the help of friends the team score 651 and Gulbis has wreaked pure misery on the opposition. A 4/7 from 8 overs topped off his batting. Some kind of effort from a number 8.

GRAB THE PLUNGER – brought to you by the Deagon Deviation.


– Jonathan Trott. There a lot of funny and rewarding moments from this year’s 5-0 pantsing of the English. However what wasn’t funny was when Jonathan Trott left the tour for what we were lead to believe was depression. We all felt for him to a degree, no one wants to kick man while he’s down. Depression funnily enough is not very funny, so no surprise that it came as a surprise when Trott revealed he was simply too tired to put up a fight against the Aussies this summer. He was panned by former English captains and players and rightly so. At least Graeme Swann was man enough to admit his simply wasn’t up for it anymore. That after bowling hundreds of overs. Trott played two unmemorable innings that were caned by David Warner who was in turn lambasted for his insensitivities. Maybe Warner was right in the end. Hopefully next time Trott has a bad run he can use the usual excuses and not lead us to believe something worse.

INTERMISSION LINK – This Week’s Youtube Clips


Best and worst of goalkeeping.

How previous F1 drivers dealt with disqualification – not only did the steward cop a mouthful but the car was left in the pitlane.



Cricket can be a boring game, lord knows when you can’t seem to middle them life can be frustrating. South Australian cricketer Daniel Worrall got creative and carved out a little Louvre-work into the surface. Whilst he’s been suspended and punished, no one has critiqued the work which seems quite the realistic nd maybe up for an Archibald prize, although hard to tell who it’s a portrait of.

He will be spoken to and further punished by SA Director of Cricket Jamie Cox. Good.
VALUE FOR MONEY – Brought to you by SRUPT Industries

Good – Bribing multiple FIFA representative to win 2022 World Cup in a place who had no right to host it and now need to move it to their Winter as it is too hot to play in normal time. Still won the vote though.

Bad – Dave “Coaltrain” Taylor – on the outer with the Titans already due to sloth.

UPCOMING  WEEKEND HIGHLIGHTS – presented by Womack Industries Inc. (Formerly Womack & Womack)


– Major League Baseball in Australia.

– AFL Part 2 – will be hard to top for upsets from last week.

– More NRL.

– More T20 World Cup minnows followed by Australia v Pakistan on Sunday night. Hogg.

– Sheffield Shield – NSW v WA in Canberra. Of course it is.


card up sleeve

So close last week – here’s the score.
AFL multi 3/4
QRL multi 3/4

AFL Multi $19
ADELAIDE +21.5 start v Geelong
ESSENDON to beat North by 1-39
BRISBANE +46.5 start v Hawthorn
BULLDOGS +24.5 start v West Coast

LA Dodgers to win Sydney series 2-0 @ $2.45

QRL Multi $19
IPSWICH to beat Burleigh
REDCLIFFE to beat Easts
NORTHS to beat Sunshine Coast with -32.5 start.
MACKAY CUTTERS to beat Wynnum